


Remember Me When You're Famous

by Gatorade_blade



Series: When You're Famous [1]
Category: Hermitcraft RPF, MindCrack RPF
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Boys In Love, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Highschool AU, I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M, Miscommunication, Misinterpretations, Modern AU, NHO, Slow Burn, Time Skips
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-12
Updated: 2020-10-19
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:42:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 27,710
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25863778
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gatorade_blade/pseuds/Gatorade_blade
Summary: Beef intends to start and end his final year of highschool with his three bestfriends by his side like always.Etho might have to make a change of plans.
Relationships: Docm77/BdoubleO100, Etho/Daniel M. | VintageBeef
Series: When You're Famous [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1972258
Comments: 169
Kudos: 167





	1. Moments Like These

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first work in this fandom and on this website, so I honestly don't know what I'm doing. Anyways, enjoy the book!

Music carried its way from throughout the house and into the bathroom as the Canadian hummed to the soft, hushed radio echoing from his bedroom. Waves and whispers of the song rang through his body as he swayed to the beat carefully.

Tanned fingers worked their way through creamy brown locks, holding the hair in place to style it for the day. He sighed, blue eyes flickering over his mirror tentatively before pulling back to take a final look over himself.

_ I guess i’ve looked worst before _

The loud honk of a horn erupted from outside the male’s window, pulling him from his thoughts and over to said glass pane. A small slit connected the seclusion of his room to the outside world, a cool morning draft ricocheting its way over to him. 

“You done with your makeup yet, Beef?” A thick German accent called out from the outside world, a smile in his words and jokes in his tone. 

Beef huffed an irritated breath before leaving his bathroom to open up the said window just enough to pull his torso through, glaring at the car which carried his three best friends as they giggled to themselves at his apparent frustration, “Ha ha, very funny. I’ll be down in a minute.” He scowled half heartedly as he retreated back into his home to turn off his lights and shrug his school bag over his shoulder, skipping down the carpeted stairs of his quiet house and sliding to his front door. He shuffled for a minute as he fit his shoes onto his feet, stumbling out of his doorway as he made a straight line over to the rumbling car in his driveway. 

Climbing into the silver sedan, Beef gave a small punch into Doc’s shoulder, earning himself another muffled chuckle. Six thirty in the morning was most definitely not his favorite time in the world, but he had to make due. “We purposely pick you up last for a reason, dude.” Etho chuckled lowly as he bumped his knee against the other male’s and offered a cup of iced coffee to the other. Beef took a minute to stare the other down before giving in and taking the plastic cup from the other male with an exasperated shrug on his shoulders.

This was it. This was what Beef loved more than everything. Early morning car rides with his three best friends in the world, sipping on iced coffee and making jokes as the sun came into the world. Doc always drove, picking up the others as he was the earliest raiser as well as the only one with a car. He always picked up Bdubs first, being because they lived the closest to one another, next he’d pick up the quartet’s coffee for the day and finally pick up Etho and Beef on their way to the actual school building. It was pleasant, and allowed the brunette to properly wake up before getting sucked into the exhausting 8 hours of school. 

The band of misfits had been glued together for years now, ever since they had all been conjoined by fate. Doc had just moved from Germany while Etho and Beef had respectively moved from their own homes in Canada. They just so happened to meet Bdubs in school and somehow had the knots be tied almost unknowingly. But they wouldn’t want it anyother way.

The car was filled with Doc’s music and Bdubs going off about something that Beef couldn’t quite care less about. So instead of listening to Bdubs’ never ending rambling, he focused on the cup in his hands, fumbling and messing with it before sipping the slightly bitter coffee.

As he rubbed his thumb into the condensating cup, his eyes trailed slowly over to the male sitting beside him. Blue eyes followed the way the male’s fluffy white hair curled around his face and fell gently over his bone structure. Sharp collar bones and thin shoulders hidden snuggly behind the large dark blue sweater he wore today and the way his jeans scrunched up around his knees and hips. Etho’s eyes were closed shut in a light sleep as his head tilted over to rest on the cool glass of the car window, his coffee balanced shakily in his loose grip over his lap. 

Beef only broke himself from his stares once he had realized the almost abrupt stop of the vehicle. He looked up to the front of the car to see Bdubs and Doc in a half hearted argument, as Doc had finally settled in his parking spot on the school lot. It was their senior year and they had finally gotten access to the better parking sections.

Beef gently tapped on the other Canadian’s knee before watching heterochromatic eyes flutter open in a tired manner, blinking a few times to adjust to the light of the world around him. He grumbled a soft ‘morning’ as he smiled over to his best friend, slowly straightening his back as he adjusted himself in the car. 

He glanced over to the two in the front seats before smiling and leaning over to Beef, muttering a playful, ‘What’s the old married couple on about now?’ The brunette laughed softly at the joke, only to watch Bdubs sticking his tongue out to Etho like a little kid. A laughter erupting from the parties in the car as he did so.

Yeah. Beef loved moments like these.


	2. Afternoons at Doc's

The heavy pants and dribbling on the orange leathered basketball echoed in Doc’s driveway as he shot another basket. 

“Not fair, you’re an absolute giant.” Bdubs protested as he wiped his face of the sweat which had built up for the past hour of trying to beat the German at his own game. He and Beef had been battling in a game of basketball against Doc and Etho, and were ultimately failing.

“Not my fault. You're just bad at this.” Doc rumbled out in a small chuckle as he tossed the ball between his hands. That broke the two out into a small argument, mostly revolving around Doc’s crazy height and Bdubs’ inability to shoot straight. 

Beef smiled to himself as he watched with a tired sigh on his lips, going over to sit down beside Etho on the hard grey concrete. The white haired male handed him a bottle of water as their eyes met halfway, the heterochromatic eyes lighting up in a silent grin. 

“I’m surprised you're not mad at me.” 

Beef rolled his shoulders back as he opened up his water battle, sipping from it leisurely, “Why would I be mad at you, E?”  
  


“Maybe because we absolutely kicked your butt. But okay.” He giggled to himself as Beef coughed on his water.

“Woah, hold up mister, I think we did fine. It’s not our fault that you and Doc read each other’s minds.” 

“Well, we don’t read each other’s minds, so there’s that. We just know that you two are predictable.” The string of words made Beef’s face light up in a hue so bright and hot, he could feel his ears growing warm from something that wasn’t just the exhaust from basketball. 

Etho always had a way with words that were both admirable and irritable. And he knew just how to rub his best friends in just a way to make them lose in any words battle with him. Beef hated it. 

Just as words began to pool their way into Beef’s brain again, he was brought back to the world with Bdubs sittting next to him with a heavy sigh.

“Okay then, what if I get Etho on my team, huh?” The shortest of the quartet asked almost defensively as Doc rolled his eyes. 

“You can’t just take Etho. Besides, it wasn’t Beef's fault that you lost either. It was completely on you. I’ll take you on, 1v1 right here.” He gave an almost evil smile as he watched Bdubs shift where he sat. 

“Y’know, on second thought, why don’t we go inside and order a pizza.” The sudden change in Bdubs’ dynamic and conversation left a small laugh shared amongst the remaining three. The brunette was quick to turn on his heel, plotting a straight line over to the door of Doc’s basement. 

“Only if you’re the one paying!” 

-

The four boys sprawled out lazily on the plush couch and carpeted floors of Doc’s basement. Bdubs and Doc argued over the last slice of pizza while Etho quietly started his homework and Beef scrolled aimlessly on his phone.

Beef’s eyes flickered over to the white haired male as he hummed to himself, crossing something off of his paper with knitted brows. Beef had never really noticed how attractive his friend was. Of course he knew that his friend was good looking, all of his friends were good looking. But something about the way the curled locks of white draped over the male’s forehead, the way his fair skin seemed to glow in the faint light of the oddly lit basement, caught the brunette’s eye more than he may want to admit. 

He hadn’t even realized that he was staring until heterochromatic eyes of grey and red met his own blue, a small “Hey Beefers?” whispered out of lips so pale and plush it made Beef stammer out his response.

“Y-yeah?” He hadn’t noticed that his phone was turned off, so he had no excuse that he had just been staring almost (but most totally not) lovingly at one of his closest friends. 

“Can I stay over your place tonight?” There was a soft glow in his eyes that made Beef’s brain stop working for a second.

The reason being, well he wasn’t sure. But Etho comes over all the time. Especially last summer when he did yard work for the community, he would often crash at Beef’s place. 

“Uh- sure thing. Of course.” His answer came out short and in choppy spurts as he reached over to his water to take a sip. “Any reason? Are you just in need of my genius expertise with your science homework?” 

Etho laughed, throwing his eraser at the older, “Oh yes, teach me your ways, wise one. It’s not like I'm in a higher science class than you or anything.” 

Beef scoffed, elbowing the other in the side, earning a small ‘oof’ from Etho, “Alright smart guy. We can leave when you’re done with your work.” 

“What, you don’t have any homework to do?”

“None that’s due tomorrow, so no, I don’t.” He smiled smugly as he went back to looking at his phone.

By the end of their conversation, Bdubs and Doc had decided that their arguing was pointless and to simply split the pizza in half, now going to do the same as the younger Canadian and moving to work on some homework. 

The three worked quickly amongst the problems and questions, bouncing ideas and answers off one another until Etho sighed slowly and began packing up his notebook, sparing a short glance to Beef.

“We’re gonna head out Doc, we’ll see you two tomorrow morning.” Beef began as he sat up from where he sat on the couch, stretching to release the tension from staying still for so long. 

“I can drop you guys off when I bring Bdubs home.” 

“It’s fine Doc, the walk is nice when the sun is setting.” 

“Alright then, see you guys!” Bdubs smiled as he waved them off, turning back to resume his worksheet.

Beef waved back before pinching himself lightly. He had to make sure he wasn’t ogling-for whatever reason-at Etho anymore.


	3. Night At Beef's

The two made it back to Beef’s house right before the moon made its grand appearance, the walk only a good 15 minutes. They made a quick greeting to Beef’s parents before retreating to the brunette's room for the night to do whatever they so pleased. 

“Do you still have those clothes I left here last week?” Etho muttered as he placed his bookbag down on the floor by the door.

“Yeah, they should be on my dresser.” 

“Very nice. You folded them and everything.” 

“I’m not a slob, Etho. I care a lot about the builds around me and so I want to keep it clean.” He tilted his chin up almost cockily as he sat on his bed, back pressing against the headboard.

“I see, well i’m gonna go shower.” Etho said before retreating from the large room, leaving Beef alone. 

He sat there for a moment before setting up his couch as a bed for the younger. Pulling out a set of blankets and pillows from under his bed and flopping it onto the couch carefully. 

Etho never showered for too long, always weary over not hogging the bathroom, and for some reason always showered with cold water. He was always the kind of person who was very 'to himself', never really talking too much about himself and would much rather talk about a situation at hand or listening to the people around him fill in silence. That’s just how Etho had always been, and Beef (along with Bdubs and Doc) had always respected that, never prying on any topic he didn’t want to dive into. 

Beef ran a hand over the blankets, smoothing out the fabric as he allowed his mind to trail back to earlier. He’d been staring at Etho more and more recently, for reasons he wasn’t even sure of. Etho was just Etho. The same goofy, mischievous, quiet genius he had always been since the moment the two had met years ago. So why now? 

His thoughts were interrupted with his door opening, a sopping wet Etho peeking his head through the thin crack, a soft blush lighting across his cheeks. “Hey Beefers. I don’t have a sleeping shirt for some reason, can I borrow one of yours?” 

Blue eyes blinked about furiously before Beef frantically stood up, pacing over to his dresser to pull out a washed out band t shirt. Etho took it with a small nod of thanks as he retreated back into the bathroom, pulling the fabric over his head. 

Now, Beef and Etho were about the same height, but Beef definitely had a wider shoulder width and chest than the other, that probably being due to him being a few months older. With this in mind, Beef should’ve been fine with seeing the younger walk through his door and into the bedroom. But the sight of Etho drowning in the muted fabrics of his sweatpants and the large ‘Pink Floyd’ shirt sent a feeling down Beef’s spine, circling straight into his heart. 

“Bathroom’s free.” Etho muttered as he shoved his old clothes into his bookbag, carding a hand through his wet, towel worn, hair.

Without even a reply, Beef dashed to the bathroom to shower, closing and locking the door shut as he regained his breath. 

_ What is happening to me? _

-

Beef walked back into the room with a fresh pair of clothes wrapped around him, flopping onto his bed with a silent grunt as he rearranged himself to have his hands folded neatly behind his head and tilting his vision just enough so that he could see Etho, who sat on the couch with an absent stare to his phone. 

Heterochromatic eyes flickered over to Beef, he smiled softly as he watched the older wait for him to start a conversation, “How was the shower?” 

“Great. Just wish I wasn’t so sore-have I mentioned that I hate playing basketball against you and Doc?”

“Well maybe you shouldn’t choose to play with Bdubs next time.”

“Not my fault Bdubs and Doc are awful partners, someone’s gotta take one for the team.”

“You could team up with Doc.”

“Eh, it’s different. Doc and Bdubs are so serious sometimes. I think that’s why they butt heads so much.”

“Really? I thought they were just having the longest beauty competition and were in a jealous rage to see who is the prettiest.”

“Haha, very funny. Nevermind, maybe Bdubs is the best partner for me. You can’t take anything seriously.”

“Aw, come on Beefers. You laugh most of the time.” 

“Only half of the time.” He spoke half heartedly, they both knew that they cherished their time together. “So, what’s shaking in the wondrous world of Etho?” 

“That's what you were really thinking about in the shower, wasn't it?” 

“Wha- of course not. Don’t flatter yourself. I have plenty of important things to think about in the shower aside from your dumb face.” 

A light laughter rumbled between them as Etho turned his phone off and shifted so that he was on his side and facing Beef. 

“And what might one of those oh-so-very important things be? Huh?” 

“It’s senior year, E. I’m trying to get a grasp of my future. I’ve got it all planned out, after I graduate, I’m gonna run the most wonderful resort ever. People from all around the world will come to lounge in my opulent beach resort.” 

“Opulent, huh?” 

“Yeah, and maybe i’ll even get you a private sweet if you come visit. Just cause we’re friends.” Beef chuckled something light hearted to himself as he spoke the string of words, a smile on his face before watching Etho shift almost uncomfortably. 

The younger was quiet for just a moment, barely recognizable, before uttering out a small, “Well, as long as you remember me when you’re famous.”

They sat there in the dimly lit room for a minute, a thick silence separating the two before Beef propped himself up on his elbows to look at the other formally. “How could I possibly forget you?” Beef almost sounded offended as he finally spoke up, his brows furrowed and eyes glazed in a confusion he wasn’t familiar with. 

They locked eyes in the dimly lit room, only the moon’s pale light peeking through the window as they stared into each other's eyes. Beef held his breath as he waited for Etho to respond to his question, but was only met with a drained laugh.

“Aw you really do care about me.” Etho teased as he shifted back over to face the other side of the couch, “Good night, Beefers.” 

Beef didn’t get a full moment to process just as to what had just happened, but apparently the younger was already clocking in for the night so he forced himself to snap out of it, uttering a soft, ‘Yeah, good night Etho’ before lying back down to try and get some sleep.


	4. Status Update: Still Single

“You guys are never gonna believe it!” Bdubs shouted with a wide smile as he crashed into Doc’s back with a forceful koala hug, arms draping over his shoulder as he just barely hung from the ground. 

“You learned how to climb Doc in record time?” Etho chuckled as he sat down beside Beef, handing him a newly bought soda. 

“No. But I  _ am  _ a part of the decorating committee for Homecoming this year! So I know the theme before most people!” Bdubs exclaimed as he let go of Doc, allowing them both to sit down. It was late after school and clubs had just finished, Doc and Etho had come from robotics club while Bdubs came from the homecoming committee, meeting Beef in the courtyard where he was waiting for them after tutoring. 

“Homecoming isn’t until another two weeks though. Are we even going?” Doc asked, ruffling Bdubs’ spiked hair with a grin on his face.

“Yes, we are. We had so much fun last year! And the year before that!” Bdubs cheered again, elbowing Doc on the side.

Beef chuckled lowly as he opened his soda and took a slow sip from it, “I mean, we always have fun. Whether paying for something or not.”

“Maybe Bdubs just wants to invite someone to homecoming but wants to look popular.”

“Ooooo, who’s the lucky one? Is it that guy in your math class?” 

“W-what? No, I am not trying to show off. Besides, Keralis and I aren’t like that.”

“What about that lower classman you tutor during lunch? Is it him?” 

“I don’t like Scar like that either! Oh my god you guys. Can’t I just want to go to a dance with my best friends without a romantic interest?” His face flushed pink in embarrassment and frustration as he pouted, earning a laugh to rumble through the three around him. 

“Okay okay, whatever you say. Beef on the other hand, what was that with that guy you were tutoring? You looked awfully happy about it.” Doc nudged his arm with an almost cheeky smile. 

Now it was Beef’s turn to turn red, “That was just Pause. He’s just a friend, promise. I don’t think i’m in the mood to date this year. Maybe in college.” He rubbed at the back of his neck with his hand as he sipped at his soda again. Beef had dated a girl for a bit in freshman year, and then a guy that following school year, just to come to a conclusion that he'd rather wait a bit before looking for something serious. 

“Wait, you’re tutoring Pause? And you didn’t tell me?” Etho pouted. That got a few looks from Doc and Bdubs, “Pause, Beef and I all had english together last year. I didn’t know I was excluded from the team.” 

“Hey, not my fault you’re in your nerdy robot club the same time I’m tutoring him.” Beef shot back with a playful smile. “Anyways, it should be Bdubs and me asking you two if you’re finally going to give dating a try in this decade.” 

Doc looked unamused as he gave a look over to Etho, “I’m not even going to answer that.” He rolled his eyes as Etho quietly laughed to himself, earning a confused look from the two brunettes.

“Wait, what? Why? Are you two dating or something?” Bdubs asked almost frantically as his eyes flickered between the two, looking to Beef as if the Canadian had any form of answer to his question.

Etho choked on his own laugh at the question before mumbling, “Dunno Doc, wanna date?” 

Doc watched how Beef’s face lit up, eyebrows shooting upwards in a practically jealous rage as he waited for Doc’s response, “Nah, you’re too tall for my taste.” He slapped the back of Etho’s head playfully, hearing the almost silent sigh from Beef beside him. 

“Wait then what is it?” Beef snapped haphazardly.

Doc snagged his soda from his hand, taking a swig before offering a mischievous smile, “You’ll learn when you’re older.”

“But we’re both older than Etho!” Bdubs scoffed as he pushed Doc’s shoulder, almost making him drop Beef’s soda.

“Then you’ll learn when you’re older than me.” The german shrugged as he handed the soda back to its original owner. 

“Not cool, Doc!” Bdubs whined as he stood up. “Come on let’s just go. Beef said he wanted to show us that new music shop, right?”

-

Doc drove them to the address Beef had sent him, the quartet now making their way over to the door of the small music shop. Inside, the store was filled with records and vinyls, albums and posters lining the walls generously. There was soft rock playing that really set the mood, a smile spread on Beef’s face.

Bdubs was quick to pull Doc aside to a display of vinyls, with a bright look in his eyes as Doc softened. That left Beef and Etho to pace around slowly, Etho running a thin finger along an album's plastic casing. 

Beef watched him quietly, Etho’s pale fingers wrapping around the album and methodically turning it over in his hand, reading the songs on the back as he nodded his head to the song playing over their heads. 

“So, about what Doc said earlier.” Beef started as he walked up beside the other Canadian, aimlessly picking up a random album to glaze over the cover photo with little interest.

Heterochromatic eyes landed on Beef, his head tilting slightly in a small question, a faint innocence looming over him as he waited expectantly for Beef to finish his thought. 

“Y’know, with you and Doc dating. Or even the before thing.” His words came out short and almost nervous as he set down the album just to pick up another one. To say that he was actually nervous, he’d deny a million times. He had no reason to be nervous. Etho could date anyone he wanted, even if it was Doc. But ever since that night over a month ago, Beef hasn’t been able to shake Etho out of his mind for more than a moment. 

Etho hummed to himself, running his thumbs down the cheap packaging, “You have to wait until you’re older than Doc. Remember?” He chuckled softly as Beef stammered over his own thoughts. 

“W- Okay then what if Doc said he was actually down to date you?” He spat as a dust of pink covered his cheeks in a shallow embarrassment. 

“Well, then I guess we’d date. But it’s not like we like each other like that. So it’d probably be a short lived romance.” They moved over from their spot at the albums to a row of posters.

“I uh- I didn’t know you liked guys.” Beef spoke up as he fingered through a row of posters, eyes avoiding the gaze of his best friend. Etho placed a hand over Beef’s causing him to stop as his breath stuttered. “E-”

“I didn’t know they still sold these posters.” He spoke, even and calm as usual, a small smile played on his lips as he pulled out the poster he had been looking at. “Oh, and I guess it doesn’t really matter to me. It’s not often I like people like that, so if it happens then I guess it kinda just happens.” He shrugged as he looked down at the poster which he held in front of him. 

Beef was speechless, he might’ve actually had a cha- no. A chance at what? Because Beef most definitely was not in love with Etho. He definitely did not want to hold the man in his arms and show him off to people. He definitely did not want to kiss the other’s lips and stare into those mismatched eyes as if his life depended on it. Definitely.

Beef was simply speechless because he wasn’t expecting to be hearing this. Yeah, that was it! He’d known Etho for what felt like forever. It was just a shock to him that just now, at the age of 18, did he finally hear this news about the other's preference. 

“Interesting. Well do you think you’re gonna buy that poster?” Beef questioned softly, reeling his hand back and massaging it from where Etho’s cold hand had touched for merely a second. 

“Probably not, I don’t know where I would put it in my room if I did end up buying it. But it is nice to look at.” He nodded his head in satisfaction as he put it back down, already moving on to another stack of posters to look through.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a heads up: The story with span out through a large period of time, and so most chapters will have time skips between them, incase anyone was confused


	5. The Futures Ahead of Us

Laughter boomed through Doc’s basement as the four males lied on top of each other. They were sprawled out on the floor in front of the couch, which was covered in pizza boxes. Doc sat upright with his legs stretched out, Bdubs’ head laying atop his lap with Etho’s head propped on Doc’s knee while Beef’s head laid on Bdubs’ stomach. 

It was almost 2 in the morning and homecoming night, which they did end up attending. They left the moment it hit midnight and beelined it to Doc’s house to order pizzas and hang out for the rest of the night, leading them to where they were now. 

Bdubs was rambling on about something he did earlier that week, Beef not really listening as he chewed the last of his pizza until a string of words caught his ear, ‘I could do it for a living if I really wanted’.

His head perked up as he shifted so that he could see the tanned brunette he was laying on. “Have you looked into any colleges for it?” It came out on a whim, but since it was there he might as well talk about it.

“Of course! Top picks for me will include carpentry and interior design, for now at least.”

“Really? You wanna do carpentry and interior design for a living?” Doc chimed as he ran a hand through Bdubs’ hair, a teasing laugh on his tongue. 

Bdubs swat at Doc's arm with slight irritation, “Of course! It’s what I enjoy doing, and frankly, I’m quite good at it.”

“Eh, you’re above average at most.”

“Hey! Well- I would’t expect you to understand. It's a work of craftmanship you couldn't comprehend. What are you planning on doing after school anyway, Doc?” 

“Scientific engineering. I already got colleges lined up with so many scholarships that I can take the courses twice and not pay a dime.” 

“Geez, who could possibly want you?” Bdubs retorted as he slapped Doc’s chest with a growing smirk on his face, only earning a smack at the top of his head from Doc. “What about you Beef? What’s your plans?”

“I wanna run a resort, someplace nice and opulent. Probably along the coast to get a good beach in the picture.” 

“Growing up and leaving us I see.”

“As if. There’s that old abandoned beach hotel plot right by the city, only an hour or two away from here. That’s where I want it.” 

He closed his eyes as he basked in the thought of it all. Managing his own resort, living in an opulent hacienda type of home. He’d spend his days working and then come home to longue in the house he designed himself, maybe even have Bdubs help with the design. And he’d spend his nights doing paperwork and finances, then go for a walk with- 

“Etho, what about you?” 

The white haired male fiddled with his hands for a moment before offering a silent shrug, his eyes fixed on his fingers as if they were the most interesting thing in the world.

Doc and Bdubs shared a look at one another before shrugging it off. Etho didn’t want to talk about it for whatever reason, meaning they weren’t going to pry on it. Beef however caught on to how uncharacteristically quiet he had gotten. Sure, Etho was a relatively quiet guy who would much rather keep to himself compared to any of them. But he always chimed in with some kind of sarcasm, somewhere in their conversations. And yet, he didn’t for the rest of the night. He remained quiet and cut off, as if he could never even talk in the first place. He still nodded and laughed almost as if on cue to where the conversation had led. But his lips stayed still in a thin line as he listened to the three talk.

About thirty minutes into their conversation, Doc let out a discomforting grunt as he shifted under Bdubs and Etho’s heads, grumbling out a small, “I’m gonna need you two to get off of me, my legs are falling asleep here.” 

Etho was quick to comply as he moved to sit next to where Beef had shifted over to, while Bdubs grumbled a small whine before removing his head, all four of them coming out of their comfortable display and moving over to sit criss crossed in a semicircle-like shape. 

“I don’t see why I had to move. I was plenty comfortable.” Bdubs pouted before Doc smacked at the back of his head half heartedly, laughing as Bdubs exclaimed over exaggeratedly. 

“Your big head was cutting off my blood flow. That’s why.” Doc stuck his tongue out as Bdubs pushed his shoulder.

Etho smiled at their exchange as he curled in on himself, his thighs pressed tight against his chest as he rested his head on the top of his knees. 

Beef watched him through the corner of his eye as he joined in on Doc and Bdubs’ playful argument, his focus more on making the younger Canadian laugh at his small remark than what he was actually arguing over. 

They didn’t end up going to sleep until almost six in the morning, that day. But since they had made no plans and no school was in the schedule seeing as it was a Saturday night, they had the entirety of Sunday to sleep in and continue their leisurely hanging out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is a bit of a short filler chapter since it'll start diving into more plot heavy stuff next chapter. Expect more of these lil fluff moments with the boys though, because I can't get enough of them lol


	6. Holiday Plans

It was nearing the end of November and the chills of the world set heavy in their town. Couples and families alike bundled up in scarves and hats to drown out the kiss of Jack Frost upon their lips.

Days like this, four highschool seniors find themselves huddled together in a booth at a small diner, ordering coffee and hot meals while they poked fun at one another. And today just so happened to be one of those days for the quartet of mischief makers. 

Doc and Bdubs sat on one side of the booth while the two Canadians took the other side, their knees bumping as Etho sat himself down and opened the menu. 

“I don’t get why you get a menu every time we come here. We order the same thing every time.” Beef laughed to himself as he watched Etho look into the menu anyways, making him roll his eyes. 

“Just in case they add something new, Beefers. You never know.” Etho smiled as his eyes glazed over the last of the menu before putting it down, his smile satisfied, “Okay, nothing new.” Beef sighed with a smile on his lips as he shook his head. 

It wasn’t long before an all-too-familiar waitress came by to write down the order she already knew was on their tongues, a smile on her lips as she left them to themselves.

“So, did you guys hear about the party Genny B is throwing?” Bdubs chimed as soon as the waitress was right out of earshot, practically bouncing in his seat.

“Genny throws parties all the time Bdubs, you’re gonna have to be more specific.” Doc chuckled softly as he elbowed the shorter in the side, earning a small grunt of irritation.

Bdubs huffed exaggeratedly before scooting over in his seat, “A holiday party! The first Friday of winter break.” 

Etho hummed softly as he leaned on his arm, “I feel like Genny throws a party every other week.” 

“Maybe ‘cause he does. But all of the ones I've been to were fun. And he always has such a good crowd there.” 

“We should go. I know we have another 2 weeks, but still” Bdubs shrugged as he rolled his shoulders back, brown eyes sparkling, “I don’t think we’ve ever gone to one of Genny’s parties as a group.” 

Beef leaned on the table as he gave Bdubs a thoughtful look, “There’s the slimmest of possibilities that I’m going to Toronto for a week during break, so I think we should go too. Just in case that’s all I see of you guys.”

A white smile shimmered on Bdubs’ face at that, punching a fist in the air as he cheered out loud in victory, earning a few small laughs from the remaining three. 

“You didn’t tell me you were visiting Canada.” Etho fake whined as he turned his attention to the other Canadian. 

“My dad just told me the other day, I haven’t known for too long.” Beef shrugged lightly as he gave an apologetic smile. 

“You two should bring Bdubs and I to Canada next summer. We’ve never travelled by plane with each other.” Doc suggested, a sharp smile on his lips as he offered the vacation.

Beef watched silently through his peripheral vision as Etho seemed to shrink in his seat just the slightest, but brushed it off, “I like the sound of that! I could show you guys some of my favorite places like this one coffee shop my uncle takes me everytime I go up there.” 

“Ooo, I’m liking the sound of this more and more.” Bdubs jokes, exaggerating his voice ever so slightly.

They continued to babble on about visiting Canada, along with their plans on going to Genny’s party for the next few minutes before four hot plates of food were presented before them. They gave the waitress their thanks before she smiled and wished them a nice meal and left to continue her shift.

Now with food in front of them and rumbling stomachs, the boys dug into their food, having to pause their conversation before Doc finally gave a loud gulp of his drink, “Anyway, Etho,” The sudden call to the white haired Canadian got heterochromatic eyes shooting up to look at Doc. He hummed in acknowledgement before Doc started again, “Wasn’t your old home in Canada only a few hours away from Toronto? We could visit your old hometown too.” 

Etho took a quick swallow of his food, coughing on it before taking a sip to help the food go down, “I lived about a city away, so maybe 3-ish hours? I didn’t travel to Toronto much when I was younger.” He swept his hair from his eye shyly, making Beef’s breathing stutter. 

“Alright, so here’s what I’m thinking-” Bdubs started. 

But Beef was already lost in his own thoughts.

Why was he still acting so weird around Etho? Why did Etho shy away from talking about Canada? (He’s usually pretty enthusiastic about it.) Why was his face heating up so badly right now? Could the other’s tell? Could Etho tell?

The soft bumping of Etho’s knee against Beef’s own snapped him out of his thoughts as he looked over to said male. There was a thin line of concern written on Etho’s brow, his eyes asked a silent, ‘Are you okay?’

So that answered his last question. 

Beef pressed his knee against Etho’s as he offered a small smile and nodded his head slightly before watching a flicker in Etho’s eyes. Beef couldn’t quite put his finger onto just what the flicker was, but a wave of curiosity washed over him as his shoulders shook in a shallow shiver.

He quickly shoved another bite of his food into his mouth to distract him from the flooding of warmth, flushing his cheeks and ears. 

He finally realized that Bdubs was still talking and quickly tried to catch up with what the man was going on about, “-d then after Genny’s party we can go crash at one of our houses and watch Christmas movies. Then if Beef goes to Canada we’ll have like 2 weeks or something to rewind and just chill, separately, because even though I love you guys, I’m making plans to hang out with Keralis-”

“Keralis?!” Doc and Beef interrupted in sync, eyes flying to each other in surprise before darting back to Bdubs.

“Yeah, Keralis, why? You guys should know he’s like my favorite person in the world. Next to you guys of course.” Bdubs shrugged as he took a bite of his food, not even looking at the two other brunettes. 

“Dude, that guy hates me. We volunteer at the same animal shelter and he’s always messing with the turtle I'm in charge of.” Beef complained, shaking his head at the thought of Keralis messing with Carlos.

“That’s just his humor Beef- what about you Doc, why do you hate Keralis?” He partially teased as he kicked at the German’s leg under the table, earning a small huff. 

“Y’know, it’s nothing actually. Forget I ever said anything.” His voice was laced with a slight anger as he turned his head and took another sip from his drink, ignoring Bdubs. 

Bdubs began questioning him, starting another bickering argument between them which Beef strategically pulled out of before he was a part of their old married couple fights.

The Canadian felt a light brush against his shoulder and his attention returned to Etho. They sat in an unexpected silence amongst just the two of them as they looked into each other’s eyes.

Beef’s heart seemed to stop as he noticed his thigh had been pressed against Etho’s, and no apparent motion to have Etho move away from the touch. He felt his ears starting to get hot as he remained locked in Etho’s mesmerising mismatched eyes. 

  
  


He was falling hard for his best friend. 

  
  
  


And he didn’t even know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like I rushed that ending a little bit, but I wasn't 100% sure how I was going to finish it off anyway so that's just how it's gonna be unless I feel like going back to add onto it.


	7. Late Night Visits

Beef climbed out of his shower, wiping down tanned skin as he pulled his pajamas on and combed his fingers messily through damp hair.

It was nearing mid December and he only had one more week of school and semester finals before he went up to visit Toronto. He was more than just a little excited to say the least.

‘ _Maybe I can get some souvenirs for the guys while I’m up there. Like a postcard or something stupid and unexpected.’_

As he exited his bathroom and sat on his bed, he opened his phone to scroll through it, clearing messages and emails leisurely before hearing an abrupt taping on his window. 

Odd.

His window wasn’t next to a tree or anything, and there wasn’t a storm going on right now. So there’d be no reason for something to be making that noise. 

Regardless, he walked over to his window cautiously, looking over at his driveway before pausing completely. Quickly, he unlocked the seal and pulled the window up to stick his head out.

“Etho?! What the heck are you doing here? It’s almost midnight!” 

He met those all too familiar heterochromatic eyes and lost his breath as he watched them flicker the same way they had at the diner a few weeks ago. 

“Can I stay over tonight?” Is all he says before Beef breathes out a chilled chuckle, finally realizing just how icy cold it was outside. 

“Of course.” He quickly slipped downstairs to unlock his front door for his best friend, allowing him to escape from the bitter cold of midnight winters. As the other's thin frame made his way into the door, slipping his shoes off, Beef’s eyes locked onto the fact that he was only wearing a thin sweater with jeans. “Why are you dressed so light? It’s freezing out there!” He whisper-shouted as he grabbed the other by his wrist and pulled him to the stairs to drag him over to his room. 

“My Canadian blood.” Etho joked light heartedly, a trying smile on his tired face. 

The concern painted all over Beef’s face was way too apparent for him to reel back now, his brows knitted together as he paced over to his closet to throw one of his hoodies and pair of sweatpants to the younger. “You can’t just come to my house at midnight, wearing clothes that could get you sick! And on finals week!” He could hear Etho sigh, along with the shuffling of clothes behind him, signifying him changing clothes out into what he had just been given. 

They were a bit large on him seeing as Beef had more muscle built up than him, but they did fine to keep him warm. “So you're telling me that I can come over when finals are over?” 

Beef eyed him in a shallow irritation, “Etho, I’m being serious. What are you doing here? I love your visits, but still, this is ridiculous. Even for you.” 

He watched Etho shrink in his baggy hoodie, sitting on the couch he normally slept as he chewed on his bottom lip. “I didn’t want to be at my house tonight.” He spoke quietly as his thin fingers fiddled with the hem of his shirt. 

Beef immediately withdrew from his questioning, awkwardly sitting on his bed as he looked down at his own hands. Another thing about Etho: never mention his home life. That was a rule they set up a long time ago when the friendship of the quartet was still being mended. For whatever reason, Etho didn't want to talk about his home, ever. And just the same as all of their other rules with Etho, if he didn’t want to talk about it, they wouldn’t push it. 

So Beef gave a breathy sigh before muttering a soft, “Better get some sleep for tomorrow then. We have our first set of finals. Luckily all we need to bring are pencils, so we don’t need to drop by your place for your stuff tomorrow.”

Etho hummed in response as he curled up on the couch, melting into the comforting feel as Beef draped his usual blanket over him.

“G’night Beefers.” 

“Good night, Etho.”

-

Since it was finals week, the school rearranged the lunch schedules and split the normal lunch time in half, this meant that half as many students were in the cafeteria as usual. Luckily for Beef, he wound up with the same lunch schedule as Doc. But that also meant no lunch with Bdubs and Etho for the rest of the week.

They sat outside in the senior court yard across from the vending machines with a few of their other friends, conversing and joking around about their plans over the break and discussing Genny’s next big party. 

But Beef’s head wasn’t in the conversation around him. His thoughts were elsewhere as he scarfed down his food, standing up abruptly, causing the group around him to give him a confused look, the voices pausing for a minute.

“Doc? Can I talk to you for a minute?” Is all that leaves his mouth as his face heats up in embarrassment.

Doc paused for a moment before nodding slowly, “Yeah, of course. Um, let’s get a drink?” He stood up and led Beef over to the two vending machines on the other side of the court yard, listening in as the group behind them became muffled with their continued conversation. 

Beef let out a stuttered breath as he shoved his hands into his jacket pockets. Doc hummed as he pulled out his wallet to buy a soda, “So what’d you need me for?” 

The shorter sighed as he slumped inward where he stood, “You and Etho talk more than he and I do.” is how he decides to start before shifting on his feet almost awkwardly. 

Doc shot him an odd look, “Uh, yeah. I guess. I think he likes spending time with you more though. Incase you're jealous or something.” 

“W-what? I’m not jealous of you two! You guys can talk all you want, I don’t care about that stuff.” He took another breath before continuing, “I just-I want to know something.” 

Doc waited patiently as he opened his soda, his grey eyes unwavering as he waited for Beef to complete his thought. 

“Has Etho ever mentioned his home situation to you?” 

Doc’s eyes suddenly went cold, his jaw tightened as he leaned forward, “Why? Did something happen?” 

“He showed up at my house at midnight, no coat or bag with him. He didn’t want to talk about it to me but I just thought that maybe-” 

It was Doc’s turn to sigh this time, he rubbed at his temple with his free hand. “Look, I get that you love Etho. But you’re just gonna have to leave this to him this time.” 

The Canadian chewed on his lip before nodding, “Okay, whatever you say- Wait. I-I’m not in love with Etho. Why would you get that idea? That’s ridiculous. Me? In love with Etho?” Beef stammered as his shoulders tensed up, ears heating up in a bright hue.

The German’s eyes softened as he gave a light laugh, punching the other’s shoulder as he turned to start his way back to their group of friends, “If that’s what helps you sleep at night. And I’ll talk to Etho, by the way. You can just focus on your finals and Canada for now. Clear?” 

“Crystal.”

The worry that had been flooding Beef’s head had finally stopped washing over his brain, an almost calming wave replacing his anxiety. It was going to be okay. Doc was a good guy. Great guy even. And he was smart. Etho’s fine. Maybe he just had some kind of really bad nightmare last night. Yeah, that was it. Just didn't want to be lonely or anything.

As for the other note, Beef felt his hand crawl up to his chest hesitantly, fumbling with the fabric of his coat before exhaling. He hadn’t even realized he was holding his breath in the first place. 

_ i'm not in love with Etho, right? _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah remember that flicker thing with Etho's eyes from last chapter?  
> That's a surprise tool that'll help us later
> 
> Also, thank you all so much for the support recently! Writing this book has been really therapeutic for me and I'm glad you guys enjoy it <3


	8. Genny's Party

“Oh snap.” Etho chuckled under his breath as he propped his knee up against Doc’s dashboard and ran pale fingers through his icy white hair.

The first Friday of break had finally come and Etho, Doc and Beef were currently driving their way over to Genny’s house for the party they’ve all been buzzing about for the past few weeks. Bdubs was already over there, having hitched a ride with the party host, leaving Etho to sit up front with Doc for once. 

They were currently talking about a fight Doc got into that passing Thursday after school. The said German was trying to explain why he had a bruise planted at the top of his cheek bone as he choked down a muffled laugh, “Shut up, you assholes.” He jokingly punched Etho in the shoulder, earning a small whine from the youngest.

“Wait-wait, so you’re telling us that you pummeled this guy, and he barely got a punch in?” Beef wheezed as he clutched his stomach, his face starting to hurt from listening to the other’s story.

Doc shrugged, “I mean, what was I supposed to do? He was being a jerk and wouldn’t stop cat-calling my friend.” He smiled, showing no regret in his actions. Even if Doc is a straight A student with a freakishly genius intellect, he’s also a six foot three sports fanatic with enough punch to survive an apocalypse. And he knew it.

“Alright alright. No fights while I’m in Canada, though. I wanna see the next one.” 

“If you’re not careful Beefers, you’ll be the next one to get pummeled.” 

“Oh come on, Etho. I’m not that bad of a person. I think I’m great actually.” 

“Hmm, you sure about that? You’re about average.” Doc chimed, shooting Beef a look as he offered a toothy sly grin. 

Beef opened his mouth to try and counter the older before he heard a bell like laughter echo through the car, blue eyes immediately landing on the owner of said laugh.

It was a genuine full-hearted laugh, loud and sweet in Beef’s ears. Has Etho’s laugh always been so beautiful? 

“We’re here!” Doc exclaimed as he parked his car, fixing his coat around his shoulders as he opened his car door, quick to leave the other two in their own silence. 

Etho turned around to look at Beef before leaving, quickly locking their eyes in a single motion before smiling at him something vague and warm. Before Beef could quite register the look in his eyes however, he swung the door open and headed into the house, a playful “Don’t be late!” on his tongue as he ran off. 

  
-  
  


Three hours into the party and Beef can say he was thoroughly buzzed and completely lost where Doc and Etho had gone. He wandered around aimlessly across the house until he found himself in the kitchen, it was the only place that wasn’t jam packed with people, so he leaned against the counter and took a slow sip from his drink.

“Hey! I didn’t know you were here! I thought you said you were visiting Canada!” A firm grip landed on his shoulder, making Beef whip his head around to see who the owner of said grip was. 

“Oh, Keralis. Yeah I don’t leave until next week- so don’t get any ideas with my turtle at the animal shelter.” He smiled at the shorter, before sliding over a bit, sighing and gesturing for the other to join him. “It’s weird to think this is our last winter doing stupid stuff like this.”

“You sound like an old man, Kebab.” Kerlis laughed quietly, “Y’know, I’m surprised some of the people here never got together, do the whole highschool sweetheart thing.” 

Beef quirked an eyebrow to the other, an obvious confusion on his face, “Like who?” 

Keralis barked out a laugh at how utterly oblivious he was, “You are a whole different kind of breed, y’know that?” 

“What? Did I miss something?” 

“Oh it’s nothing. Is Etho here by the way? I haven’t seen him around.” 

“I think he’s with Doc right now, I lost him a good hour ago.” 

“Doc? No, Doc’s been arm wrestling people in the basement.” 

Beef’s brows knitted together in concern, turning to Keralis, “You better not be lying to me.” 

“Look into my eyes Kebab. Nothing but my eyes. Do I look like a person who’d lie to you?”

“Yes. You’ve lied to me on multiple occasions.” 

“Okay, that might be true. But I promise, I’m not lying!”

Beef groaned as he stood up straight from where he was leaning, “I’m going to find him. Have a nice night, Keralis.” He waved off from the other as he emerged himself back into the crowd of bodies. 

It took at least 20 minutes for Beef to poke his head through every room and hall of the house, trying to see if he could spy at least some remnant of the other Canadian anywhere. 

_ ‘Where could he be?’ _

_ ‘He never just leaves without telling us’ _

_ ‘What if something bad happened to him?’ _

_ ‘What if-’ _

Beef’s eye fixed on a frosty window, a dim street light shining down on the thin frame of an all too familiar figure. He sighed in relief as he made his way to the back door, pausing to watch the silhouette move to sit on the concrete steps of the patio.

The cold air met his sweating face in a frigid, unforeseen kiss. He sucked in a quick breath to try and get a barring over the drastic change. Hesitant steps echoed on the concrete pavement as the sound of music and chatter was quickly lost in the dark of night. 

“Hey, you okay?” Beef questioned, barely above a whisper as he sat besides Etho’s curled up body. 

The younger Canadian was cuddled up in his scarf, his pale face flushed pink against the cold as he buried his nose a bit deeper into the soft fabric. “It’s kinda chilly out here, but i’m fine.” He speaks so light and sweet, his voice never wavering from that same tone he always managed to hold together so perfectly. 

“Not in the mood for the party?” 

“It got kind of hot in there. And since I don’t really drink, it all got a bit repetitive.” 

“You mean Doc’s arm wrestling wasn’t enough for you?” Beef teased half heartedly, bumping knees with the younger. 

Etho laughed to himself softly before fixing his eyes upwards and onto the sky above him, his eyes focusing on the abyss of dark sky and hazy clouds above them before flickering in the same mysterious hue they had been doing so recently. 

The two sat in a comfortable silence for a moment before Etho finally took in a ragged breath, “The sky reminds me of the one in Canada.” 

Beef looked over to the other, a question on his lips as he stared at the other’s, “Well, it is the same sky. Isn’t it?”

Etho shook his head, a thin smile unwavering, “Not exactly. The one here is usually more pink, you see less stars but the stars you do see look brighter, _bolder_.” 

The older tilted his head up, looking into the sky to try and find what the other was going on about. He’s always sort of focused on the beauty and structure of the world around him, but never really the sky. It was a beautiful sky tonight. Not a cloud in sight as the stars smiled down at the two boys. 

“Do you miss Canada?” The brunette says gently, raking a hand through his hair.

“Sometimes, but I know I’d miss you guys more.” 

A light blush dusted across Beef’s cheeks, one he knew wasn’t there just because of the alcohol he had earlier that night. “I’ll get you something when I’m there then. Anything you want, you name it.”

“Anything?”

“Anything.”

Etho shifted his gaze over to make eye contact with his best friend, an innocent smile on his face, “Get me a necklace.” 

Well that wasn’t expected. 

“A necklace? Any one is particular?”

“Something simple, but still nice. Maybe a blue shiny rock on it. I won’t be picky.” 

“Then your wish is my command.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to rewrite this chapter like 3 times because I kept getting off tangent, so I might post some kind of oneshot having to do with some of the original ideas for what usually happens at Genny's parties. 
> 
> For now, I hope you enjoyed this chapter, next chapter should be a bit longer so I hope you're ready for that!


	9. New Years Eve

It was their fifth New Years Eve together and they were all beyond excited to all get back together. Beef had just got back from Canada two days ago, and he was itching to give his best friends the gifts he had picked out for them while he was away. 

The quartet had agreed to meet up at Doc’s house, as per usual, at around 6 pm to eat and then just hangout until midnight. Then they’d light the fireworks Bdubs brought in the same abandoned field they always did in.

Beef carried a small bag over his shoulder as he made his way over to the German’s house, a small song on his lips as he walked down the all too familiar sidewalks. He shoved his hands into the comfort of his hoodie in attempts to shield him from the biting cold that surrounded him.

The door to Doc’s basement was always unlocked, so Beef made a stretch to reach over and turn the nob. He paused when he overheard a hushed conversation coming from inside, his breath hitching when he recognised the two voices, whispering their own soft secret.

“I don’t know if I should tell him Doc.”

“Well you’re gonna have to eventually, Etho. You can’t just leave him on a whim.” 

“But what if he doesn’t take it well?” 

“So you’re just going to continue living on like this?”

“It’s easier this way. I just want him to stay happy for as long as he can.” 

_ ‘Who’re they talking about?’ _

“Etho, the guy’s obviously in love with y-”

“But you don’t actually know that. He’s going to have to admit it to himself before he admits it to me. And let’s hope he doesn’t because I don’t want to break his heart. He doesn’t deserve that.” 

The conversation ended with Doc letting out a heavy sigh, and the sudden sound of movement. Beef quickly stepped away from the door, backing up until he was well in the center of the basketball court. 

Whatever they were talking about, Beef had no idea. But he knew one thing. He’s never heard Etho sounding so utterly distressed. The raw emotion in the usually cheerful and leveled male made Beef’s heart hurt. 

“Beef?” The sudden call to his name made him whip his head around at a neck breaking speed. “It’s so good to see your face again! What’re you doing just standing outside?” It was Bdubs. There was a wide smile on his face as he pulled the Canadian into a hug, squeezing lightly before letting go to look him in the eyes. “C’mon let’s go inside.” 

Beef blinked himself out of his shock, taking a deep breath before smiling back at the other, “Right.” If Doc and Etho wanted him to know what they were talking about, they'd tell him themselves. So he had to try his best and just forget about what he had just witnessed for now. 

Bdubs opens the door for him this time, a loud “The Beef is back, baby!” reverberating off his tongue. 

Doc, who had been sitting on his couch, jumped at the sudden outburst and fell off the comfort of his couch and onto the carpeted floor. “Thanks for the warning.” He grumbled as he walked up to Bdubs and ruffled his brown hair, quick to pass him by to pull Beef in a half hug. “What’s the bag for? I thought Bdubs was in charge of bringing the fireworks.” 

“Oh,” Beef slung his bag off of his shoulder and set it on the floor as he opened it, “I got you guys some souvenirs from Toronto.” He smiled as he reached inside of the bag, pulling out a red headband and dark grey cap with green accents. He handed the headband to Bdubs and the cap to Doc.

“Aww, you didn’t have to.” Bdubs grinned as he tied the headband around his head, “How do I look?” 

“Like you but with more red.” Doc teased as he moved the hat in his hand to see the front of it, “NHO? You mean that little group name we used back in freshman year?” 

Beef shrugged at the mild sentiment, “Yeah, I have an uncle in Toronto who let me custom design it. I thought it’d be cool.” 

“It is.” It was now Doc’s turn to smile at Beef as he fit the cap on his head, punching Beef’s shoulder half heartedly. 

The three moved over to sit on Doc’s couch, continuing to thank Beef for the gifts and poking fun at each other before Bdubs paused, “Is Etho here yet by the way?” 

“Oh yeah, his dad called him so he went to the other room to get some privacy.” Doc motioned towards the door leading to the stairs right on time as it slowly opened, the said Canadian standing on the other side of it.

“Etho! Get over here! Beef brought presents.” Bdubs called out to the other, motioning his hands in an exaggerated manner to come sit with them. “Like the new headband? I think it brings out my eyes.” 

Etho laughed softly, “Oh snap, you look amazing.” He seated himself next to Doc, the German’s arm almost automatically draping over and around his thin shoulder. Beef took immediate notice but swallowed down the rising feeling in his chest.

They’re just best friends.

_ We’re  _ just best friends.

“So what’d you get for Etho?” Bdubs asks with a bounce in his voice.

“Give me a second.” Beef blinked a few times before reaching for his bag, pushing in and pulling out a small black box. “As requested, here is your order, Sir.” He flashed an almost cocky smile as he handed it to Etho, a light illuminating in those heterochromatic eyes. 

Thin fingers were quick to open up the smooth box, a smile stretching on his face as his eyes landed on the item inside. It was a simple silver rope-chain with a small metal bar pendant, a diamond dressing the bar on each long side. “Woah.” He took his time hooking the necklace around his neck, smiling like a giddy child as he felt the cool chain fall against his skin. 

“Damn, Etho. You’ve got expensive taste.” Doc joked as he reached to hold the metal bar in his own hands, looking it over with careful eyes. “Y’look great though.” 

“Yeah, you look perfect.” Beef breathed out.

-

5...

4...

3...

2...

1!

“HAPPY NEW YEARS!!”

The four cheered out, loud and excited as they quickly gathered their things and made a bee line over to Doc’s car, to drive to the old abandoned field behind the diner they frequently visited which was currently closed. 

They stumbled out of the car as Bdubs started to set up his fireworks, they were a good bit away from any homes in the area which allowed them to set off as many as they wanted with any form of noise complaint. And luckily for Bdubs he was good friends with a guy who always supplied a lot of rockets. He’ll have to thank Tango later though, because right now he’s got some fun to ensure. 

Doc and Bdubs took to the front to set off the rockets while Etho and Beef hung back and watched with wide eyes and smiling faces. With every loud burst of color came excited, breathless cheers from the boys, running around the empty field in an adrenaline filled joy. Rocket after rocket went off, the vaguely familiar feel of gunpowder raining from the sky and into their hair left them breathless as they crashed on the floor. They had run out of fireworks and found themselves lain on the dirty floor of the field, chests heaving and smiles unwavering. 

“God- that’s always way more fun than it should be.” Beef laughed out as he looked up at the sky, his eyes fixing on the loud twinkling of the stars above him. 

“Never a dull moment with Bdubs in charge!” The said male sang out as he made finger guns with his hands, aimlessly pretending to shoot at the sky. 

Doc laughed low and chesty as he slowly arose from his spot on the floor, dusting off his pants, “Bdubs- come with me to get the roman candles from my car.” 

“Help me get up first.” Bdubs whined, making grabby hands towards Doc. The german scoffed but nonetheless, helped the shorter up with a quick heave as they made their way over to his car to retrieve the new items. 

“Should we just wait for them to get back before getting up?” Etho suggested half heartedly, turning his head to look at Beef.

“‘Eh, I guess we should get off the floor, or else we might freeze to death.” The younger sprung up, reaching down to pull the older onto his feet with a breathless laugh. 

They stood there in silence, eyes meeting in the barely visible darkness. Beef always loved the other’s mismatched eyes, the cool grey and deep crimson pools so mesmerizing compared to his boring blue. Beef watched as Etho opened his mouth, about to say something, before the loud erupted blast of a roman candle rang in their ears. 

“You’ll never catch me!” Bdubs screamed as he pointed his roman candle in the sky, sprinting past the two Canadians as another flare was let loose. 

“Is that a promise?!” Doc laughed as he chased after him, not far behind, a lighter in his hand.

A loud, ‘NO IT RAN OUT’ and thud of bodies hitting the cold floor following after it met the Canadians’ ears, a laugh rumbling out of their chests. Bdubs groaned to himself before laughing at the look on Doc’s face. The german’s face was flushed and angered, but eased when he slapped at the top of Bdubs’ head and grumbled something in German that the others couldn’t understand. 

They hadn’t even realized they were lying on each other in a tangle of limbs until Beef walked over to laugh at them, the two quickly unscrambled from their spots to stand beside each other. 

“Okay- um where were we.” Bdubs coughed into his hand awkwardly, his face matching the color of his headband. 

“Roman candles.” Etho suggested with a small giggle in his words. 

“Right, right. Of course.” Doc said, standing up a bit straighter before reaching down to pick up the roman candles. 

“Make a wish before you set it off! Like a New Years wish!” Bdubs grinned like a child as he was handed a stick, looking over to the Canadians to receive small nods of agreement. 

“Okay, Ready?” Doc lit the candles in each person’s hand, “Make a wish!” And thus the flares were enlightened and shooting off. 

‘ _ I wish _ ’, Beef took a long look over to the white haired male beside him as the red light of the candle illuminated over his face and outlined his features.

  
  
  
  
  


_ ‘I wish that Etho gets his happily ever after’ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, nothing like teenage boys being teenage boys. This chapter was so much fun to write
> 
> Also don't forget to check those tags because yes. There is angst coming very soon.


	10. When Spring Comes

January was quick to leave, and spring arrived like an old friend baring flowers and happy tears to the people. All traces of cold were washed away with an enormous hug of warmth and comfort. Flowers came back into bloom and trees arose from their shed states. 

But just as seasons change, so do people. 

It started out as little things, small inconsistencies that would be hard to notice unless one’s complete attention was locked onto it. And in this case, someone’s complete attention  _ is  _ locked onto this person’s change. 

It starts when Beef notices Etho avoiding hanging out with the group when Bdubs invites the three out to a new little crepe shop. It was late noon one Saturday, all of their schedules seemingly completely clear, and with no clubs or school activities to get in the way, they had every reason to go have some fun. 

So the shock on Beef’s face when he read the text that Etho sent saying he couldn’t make it grew a quick trickle of concern to pool in his stomach. Of course Etho didn’t have to come to their hang outs every single time they beckoned him, but Etho was usually the first to make aware of his vacant spot and readiness to join the group, regardless of how stupid the escapade may be. 

And that wasn’t the last time Etho pulled something like that. It soon became that every single time any of them would invite the Canadian to come hang out with them as a group, the white haired male found an excuse. Some kind of rabbit hole to fall down to avoid hanging out with them. And to be honest, it hurt. 

It was as if the coming of spring meant that Etho was no longer allowed to hang out with them. As if the coming of spring meant that Etho couldn’t be near them anymore. Because suddenly, he stopped having lunch with them, stopped going out to the old diner with them, stopped going to Doc’s house to play basketball and lounge around in his basement until sun down. 

And it was all so abrupt. Just that January they danced around shopping malls and bought cheap broken electronics to mess around with. And now it’s like the youngest of the group had just fallen off of the face of the earth. No one got into any fight, no arguments or disputes fell between the males to have set this off.

_ It was as if one day he was here, and then the next day he just wasn’t. _

But what concerned Beef more than anything, was that despite Etho avoiding their group hangouts, the younger kept finding himself illuminated in the all too familiar light of Beef’s bedroom window on lonely nights. Nothing but sandals, jeans and a light jacket wrapped around his thin frame as he stood in Beef’s driveway. And somehow, always disappearing before Beef managed to wake up the next morning.

Every time he’d come over, Beef always opened the door to him, allowing him into his room just for the white haired male to curl up on his couch and drift off to sleep. As if nothing was wrong. As if nothing was happening. As if Etho wasn’t just distancing himself from the group of best friends he's spent so many years with. 

-

It was late-February now and Doc was inviting the quartet out to go back to that music shop from September because he wanted to buy some new vinyls. Bdubs was quick to respond with a yes, saying he wanted to look at the posters or something- Beef wasn’t really paying attention. All of his attention was based upon waiting for what Etho was going to say. 

Or rather, what the excuse would be this time. 

It took another 15 minutes of waiting, but the male finally typed in a short, ‘cant today, doing yard work’. Beef sighed in a faint disappointment before shooting back, ‘Aw, we’ll miss you E. I’m free btw, just need a ride’ 

The three hang out that day, regardless of the obvious void of missing Etho, and have fun even if the thought of the other is constantly nipping at the back of their heads. Etho was a private person, and they had to respect that. On another note, Beef hadn’t been telling the other two that Etho was showing up at his house in the dead of night some nights. He just didn’t want them to be thinking that he was hogging him in any sort of way. 

  
  
  


That night Beef was mounting a new vinyl on his wall, and despite his focus on the task, his brain wandered back to Etho. Over and over again. It wasn’t until the, now familiar, taps on his window met his ear did he snap out of his thoughts, almost automatically making his way downstairs to allow the younger into his house, 

It was the first time Beef had seen him in almost a week, and he looked a mess. Dark circles and bags under his heterochromatic eyes, white hair a mess of unkempt layers piled onto one another and not even wearing a jacket. Old blue jeans and wrinkled black shirt outlining his body as he slipped off his sandals when entering the house, his hands running a small tremor. 

Beef waited until they got to his room before he started asking him questions. “Are you okay? You look a mess.” There was worry written all across his face as he met those mismatched eyes he found himself getting lost in so often. 

“Not so bad yourself.” Etho smiled half heartedly before sitting on his usual couch, fingers reaching up to fiddle with the necklace Beef had given him from Canada. He wore it every day. 

“I’m being serious Etho. I’m starting to get worried.” 

“Aw, you do care about me.” 

“Etho.” 

“Beefers?”

“No more joking around. Why didn’t you accept Doc’s invite today.” 

“I had yard work to do.” 

“Okay, then why didn’t you come with us to Doc’s last week?”

“I needed to change my parents’ tires.”

“W-well then what about you taking up those extra classes during lunch to avoid eating with us?” 

“I need the extra credit for college.” 

Beef held his breath. Every question he shot at Etho, the younger automatically had an excuse as if he had rehearsed it all over and over again. There was not the slightest bit of lies or hesitance in Etho’s voice though, and that was what got Beef so mad. 

The brunette could feel his face heat up in frustration, his hands pulling onto the hem of the shirt he wore. He hadn’t even realized he had his eyes shut until he opened them slowly, gazing up to connect with Etho’s eyes all over again. They flickered in that all too mysterious way and Beef finally gave a breathy sigh. 

“Okay then. Well I'm going to shower, I suggest you get some sleep.” 

  
  
  


When Beef returned to his room, Etho was already passed out, curled up into a little ball like a sleeping arctic fox. His eyes softened as he felt his heart start to beat rapidly in his chest, so loud in his ears he feared that he might awaken the younger. 

He just wanted to keep the other safe, was that too much to ask? He wanted to make sure that Etho was happy and healthy. He wanted to hang out with Etho again as they made jokes at each other. Wanted them to go to the diner and sit next to him as Etho picked up the same old menu again as if it was their first time there. Wanted to hold him in his arms as Etho told him everything on his mind, all of the secrets he’s been holding on to for so long. His heart wrenched and he couldn’t even tell you why. 

Tomorrow, he’ll finally talk to Doc and Bdubs about it. About his concern for Etho. About the late night visits and unwavering eyes. About it all. 

But for now, he can just hope for the best.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bet you weren't expecting that- haha,, sorry :)) 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed that chapter (to some extent at least) because we have officially made it to the middle way mark on this story! Hope you enjoy the rest of the ride <33


	11. Long Awaited Discussion

Etho was gone that morning, his blankets folded neatly at the foot of Beef’s couch and not a single other remnant of the boy even being there. The Sunday morning sun shone in a bright mockery of Beef, smiling down on him as he sat there in his bed. 

He made quick work, shooting a text to Beef and Doc saying he needed to talk to them about the Etho situation, to which they replied back within minutes. They agreed to meet at Bdubs’ house and talk it over. Not even ten minutes later, Beef found himself at Bdubs’ front down, bouncing on the balls of his feet with an anxious flow trickling down his spine. 

He felt sick. 

Bdubs’ mom answered the door and quickly let him in before announcing she was going to head out for something. Beef walked into the home to find Bdubs in the kitchen cooking up a storm, his brows knit together in distress. 

“Oh god- you good Bdubs?” Beef asked as he stepped into the kitchen, his own worry stitched together onto his face.

“Of course not! I’m worried about Etho, so I’m stress-cooking.” He bit on his bottom lip as he realized he’s made a lot more pancakes than he had intended, “Sorry, I should probably stop.” He wiped his forehead before he sighed, tying his red headband back around his hairline and plating the newly made pancakes. 

They waited a short while for Doc to get there, sitting at the dining table in a nervous silence before the German walked into the dining room. There was a question on his brow but he refrained from asking it as he sat down at the head of the table. 

“So we’re finally gonna talk about it?” Doc sighed, rubbing at the back of his neck almost nervously before taking a hand through his brown locks. 

“Shouldn’t he be here for this though? It feels wrong to be talking about him without him here.” Bdubs rubbed at his shoulder, biting at his lip again as a guilt started to pool in his stomach, trickling steadily as a brief nausea met his head. 

“I already tried.” Beef leaned onto the table, hiding his head in his hands. “I haven’t told you guys- but every time he’s denied our hang-out invites, he’s been showing up at my house later that night.” He paused, waiting to see if he'd get some sort of backlash from them. But seeing as the two were dead silent, he continued again, “I try to never bring anything up when he comes over. But I atempted for the first time last night, and- he was so  _ oblivious  _ to it all. It was so frustrating. Like he wasn’t just leaving us in his past or anything.” 

He could hear Doc shift in his seat and take a long breath through his nose, “Look guys. There’s some…  _ things…  _ that Etho’s told me. But he doesn’t want me telling you two.” 

Bdubs’ eyes grew large as he shot a look at Doc, “What? What could possibly be so important that you two can’t tell us?!” There was an obvious hurt in his chocolate brown eyes, his hand flying to his chest to grasp at the fabric of his white shirt in a deep offense. 

“I shouldn’t have said that-” Doc cursed under his breath before muttering something in German to himself, “We always agreed to respect his privacy, why should this be any different?” 

“Because he’s obviously in a rough place right now, Doc. We just want to make sure he’s okay.” Bdubs’ usually cheered, over dramatic voice sounded almost like a plea to the other, weaker and fearful for the younger.

“Bdubs, I know he’ll be fine- he should be allowed to have his time to himself.”

“But how can  _ we  _ know he’s fine? He may open up to you more, but he’s all equally our best friend. I can’t help but feel this way, _because_ I care about him.” 

“It’s only been- what? Three weeks? Etho’s plenty capable of knowing what’s good for him right now. And right now, it’s distancing himself from our shenanigans.”

“I can’t believe you’re being such an ass right now!”

“I can’t believe you don’t trust Etho enough to let him do what he thinks is best!” 

Beef’s mouth was sealed shut as he tuned out the two’s arguing. He was just trying to catch his breath and figure out where his head was, before he was suddenly called into the conversation. 

“Beef, you have to agree with me. We deserve the right to at least know something about what Doc’s hiding from us.”

“No, Beef. You care about Etho more than anyone. You have to be on my side of this. If he wanted you two to know something, he’d tell you.”

  
  


The two waited for Beef’s response, watching him swallow the lump in his throat before he muttered a soft, “It’s not Doc’s right to tell us. We need to hear it from Etho. But we still do deserve to know what’s going on.”

“Wait- you can’t just be on both of our sides-”

“I’m not on any of your sides. I’m on Etho’s.” He placed his hand over his eyes, trying to block out his sight to focus on the mess of jumbled thoughts his brain has become. “God I just want him to be happy. To not be afraid of telling us things or shying away from us when he needs us. I- I just want everything to go back to normal.” A million and more thoughts were rushing through his head before he dropped his hand from where it had stayed on his face, looking up to see the other two’s faces.

Bdubs’ distressed face eased, a small humorless laugh leaving parted lips as he slumped down into his chair, “Beef’s right.” He then turned to Doc, his features softening as he drew in a small breath, “I shouldn’t have to force anything out of you, or Etho. But it was still wrong of you to leave us on a cliff hanger like that.” 

The warmth of Bdubs’ chocolate brown eyes just about melted Doc, his ears getting warm as he coughed into his arm, “Yeah, I guess.” He eased into his own chair before exhaling low and loud. “I’m not sure how much Etho may want me to keep quiet about- but I think I can tell you guys this much: Etho’s dad has gotten really sick and can’t work anymore. His mom now has to find a better paying job to make up for the loss of his paychecks.” 

“What?” It was less of a question and more of a disbelieving statement off of Beef’s tongue, but it worked the same. “How long have you known about this?” 

“Since maybe, November?” 

“Oh god, poor Etho.” Bdubs’ whispered to himself. 

“You can’t tell him that you know about this. He never wanted to put a burden on you two. You guys are way too empathetic.” Beef and Bdubs hesitantly nodded to the request, a heavy feeling in their stomachs.

  
-

Beef didn’t stop thinking about Etho that remaining day. He was all that was on his mind. Everything he admired about the younger, every curve of his perfect lips, the way he laughed to himself. Or even the odd things, like his cold showers and obsession with blue sweaters and wheat thins. Beef adored everything about him. 

And now with this new information about his dad, his heart only held onto the image of the other more and more. Etho was a good person, he didn’t deserve this. Sure, he liked to pull pranks and poke fun at their friends, but he was still a genuinely good person. Perfect, even.

Beef was lying in bed that night, his head still lost in thought of his best friend- replaying memories -before he lunged himself to sit up, awoken like the wracking of the sweetest nightmare. His eyes were set wide as a wave of realization ran over him like a tsunami and made his heart pound in his chest painfully loud. 

“Holy shit I’m in love with Etho.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bet you never saw that coming- 
> 
> Next chapter will be the long awaited climax and is supposed to be a bit longer than most of the chapters so far. So get those tissues ready :)) <3


	12. Things Change

It was now the first week of March, and Beef has had a lot of time to evaluate his feelings towards Etho. Doc and Bdubs agreed to slow down on the constant hangouts to not only focus on college preparations, but also so that they didn’t make Etho feel bad about not being able to come. But this meant that Etho was also no longer coming over to Beef’s house in the dead of night. 

Beef felt, for lack of better words, weird. He had never missed anyone like this, never wanted anyone like this. Not in any of his past relationships had he been so whipped that he couldn’t go five minutes without thinking of the masterpiece of a person he had fallen in love with. 

Even with seeing less and less of Etho, Beef’s feelings remained constant, his heart hammering in his chest at just the slight mention of the younger. It became practically unbearable for him to just hold it all in to himself. 

-

Beef made a sharp turn around one of the corners of the monochromatic school hallways, his mind wandering to the quiz he'd have in his next period before he came face to face with Bdubs and Doc, nearly colliding with them. 

“Woah- careful you two.” He smiled as he made eye contact with them but paused as he read the expressions on their faces. They exchanged a quick glance to each other, looking haphazardly nervous before moving closer to each other as if blocking what was behind them. “Um, are you two okay?” 

“FINE! Just peachy!” Bdubs exclaimed as he waved his hands in the air frantically. 

Beef’s brows knitted together in a bubbling confusion, tilting his head to try and see just as to what the others were hiding from him. Doc shifted his body to block the view behind him, placing a hand on the Canadian’s shoulder with a shaky smile on his lips. 

“What are you two doing?”

“Oh nothing!” Doc whipped his head around to look behind him before releasing Beef’s shoulder, “You should get to class.” 

“Okay?” Beef shot them another questioning glance before they hurried away down the hallway, avoiding anymore awkward eye contact with him. 

_Well that was weird._

-

It was now Friday and Beef had still gotten no explanation for Bdubs and Doc’s odd behavior from earlier that week. But he wasn’t wasting too much energy on thinking about that. Because Etho had just shot him a text earlier, asking if he could come and stay over that night. 

He danced around the animal shelter, humming to the animals as he helped refill their food and checked up on the turtle he was in charge of. He was obviously happier than usual, a smile on his lips as he talked to Carlos, petting his shell. 

“Well someone’s happy.” Keralis cooed as he walked up to Beef.

“Oh it’s you. You better not get any ideas about moving Carlos’ tank again.”

“I’m not, Kebab! Cross my heart.” Keralis raised his hands up in a mock defense before crouching down next to Beef. “Hm, it’s Etho isn’t it?”

“W-what? What do you mean ‘it’s Etho’??” Beef’s face automatically lit up into a bright shade of red, his ears much too warm for comfort. 

“You’re obviously head over heels for him, Kebab. But don’t worry, your secret is safe with me.” He gave a small smile as he rested his hand over his chest as if reciting a pledge to some higher power. 

Beef breathed out an amused laugh before shaking his head, too drunk on happiness to protest, “Alright, Keralis. I’m clocking out for the day since Carlos is doing just fine. I’ll see you around.” He waved the other off before heading out, grabbing his bag and slinging it across his shoulder with a relieved sigh. 

-

The rest of the day felt like forever, but as the sky flushed pink in the late noon, the wind came. Etho knocked on Beef’s front door for the first time in what had felt like eternity and Beef wasted no time opening it to let Etho inside. 

Etho looked a lot better in comparison to how he had been the last time he was here, and it brought a smile to Beef’s lips. “Hi, Beefers.” Etho smiled warmly as he was let in. 

“Hi yourself, I missed you.” He laughed under his breath, “Have you eaten yet?” 

“Nope, I was hoping you had food.” He joked as he worked his shoes off his feet, his eyes glancing up to meet Beef’s. 

Beef had to blink himself back to reality to keep a hold onto himself before responding, “I’ll order a pizza then. C’mon we can wait in my room.” Etho let out a small happy cheer which made Beef’s heart stutter at how utterly cute it was to him.

  
  
  


The rest of that afternoon worked out a lot smoother for Beef than he would’ve expected. Because in the end, Etho was still his best friend, and nothing could break that. It was now dipping into night time and Beef had just finished showering, stepping into his room with a small hum on his lips. 

Etho sat on the floor of the room, a small box in his lap as he traced his fingers over a long strip of paper in one of his hands while the other one fiddled with his necklace. 

“What’re you looking at?” Beef asked softly as he crouched down to loom over Etho’s shoulder, his blue eyes landing on an old photo strip taken from a photo booth. In the four vertical pictures were a younger Beef and Etho, they were in freshman year during this and had stumbled upon the photo booth while at the shopping mall. They were supposed to meet up with Bdubs and Doc in the food court but obviously got distracted with the pictures as clear evidence. 

“I never realized how big your hands were compared to mine.” Etho mumbled softly as he ran his thumb along the bottom photo. It was of them making silly jazz hands as they smiled into the camera. 

Beef’s heart raced as Etho placed the photo back into the box and pulled his hand up to Beef’s and pressed them together gently. Beef’s hand was noticeably larger, his calloused fingers reaching over top Etho’s cold slim digits. He nodded his head in a silent agreement almost frantically, watching as Etho retracted his hand back and pulled another photo from the box. 

“When did we take this?” Beef asked softly, his eyes gazing across the picture. It was Beef and Etho laughing on Doc’s couch, the said German in the back of the photo with a pissed off face and what could be assumed as Bdubs taking the photo. 

Etho shifted where he sat, uncomfortably, as he pulled on his necklace, “Oh um, that was the night you got dumped by your boyfriend.” 

Oh yeah. Beef’s boyfriend had just broken it off with him after roughly four months of dating, and so the quartet all slept over Doc’s house to help cheer him up. He had completely forgotten about the idea of heartbreak. Especially with Etho next to him to cheer him up. 

Etho gave a slow yawn as he set the photo back into the box and stretched himself with a roll of his shoulder and the arch of his back, his neck pressing into Beef’s shoulder, making the older’s heart stop. 

“Y-you look tired, lemme set up the couch.” Beef quickly stood up, starting to walk over to the pile of folded blankets by his bed. But he was abruptly stopped by thin fingers latching onto his wrist, keeping him from moving any further.

“Actually- um… Can I sleep in your bed with you tonight?” 

Huh?

If Etho was trying to kill Beef, then he just about did it. The younger looked so shy and timid, his eyes fixed on his hand that was still nervously fiddling with his necklace. Pale lips were screwed shut into a thin line, his nerves making a pink tint on his perfectly framed cheekbones. 

“I’m sorry, I don’t think I heard you right.” 

“N-nevermind, I-it was nothing. Forget I said any-” 

“Etho.” They both paused and their eyes finally met, Etho’s eyes flickered into that dark mysterious hue that Beef wanted to explore so badly. “You can sleep in my bed.” Both their faces flushed a deep scarlet red as Etho nodded quickly, still holding onto Beef’s wrist as he was led to the bed. 

Beef climbed in first, lying on his side and moved over to make room for the younger. But when Etho climbed onto the bed, Beef just about forgot how to breathe. Etho folded himself up and into Beef’s chest, his head sitting right below his collarbone. He fit so perfectly and looked so small and innocent, his hands gently holding onto Beef’s shirt.

How Etho didn’t hear the syncopated pounding of Beef’s heart, he didn’t know. But it rang so loud in his blood flushed ears as Etho snuggled closer, before he forced himself into a deep breath. Beef fit one of his arms in between their two bodies while the other fell gently over the younger’s ear, brushing his hair from his temple before drifting off to sleep. A single thought on his mind. 

_I can’t do this anymore. Tomorrow i’m going to confess to him._

  
-  
  


That morning, Beef awoke to find his arms wrapped tightly around Etho’s lower back, a mild panic rising in him before he realized that Etho was still soundly asleep, breathing slowly into the comfort of Beef's shirt. He sighed as he started to slowly retract his hands back from where they were wound up around him, before Etho let out an almost needy whine, pressing his body closer to Beef's. 

Blush engulfed Beef so quickly and so strong he was afraid he’d melt (if he hadn’t already). But as air finally started to come back to his lungs, he began to simply admire the moment while he could. 

He was going to try and confess to Etho today. And if that meant that Etho turned him down and wanted to remain friends, he’d have to take it like a man and comply. So he allowed himself this one indulgence and followed the way the morning light danced across Etho’s face, his perfect lips and thin cheeks, his messily tousled fluffy white locks of hair and pale untouched skin. 

His thoughts were interrupted when heterochromatic eyes fluttered open, taking a moment to adjust to the light of the room as he rubbed at them like a little kid. ' _Adorable_.' Etho let out a soft groan as he propped himself up on his arm, “g’mornin” he uttered in a voice so small and light it made Beef’s heart twinge. “Were you up for awhile?” 

“No, just got up right before you.” God he was pining for him badly. 

“Mhmm,” Etho yawned as he stretched, his nose twitching like a little fox as his eyes finally met Beef’s. “What time is it?” 

Beef reached for his phone, turning it on quickly to read out the digits, “9:20. Not too bad for a Saturday.” He chuckled softly as Etho kicked his legs off the bed and stood up. 

“Let’s make some breakfast.” Etho smiled, the light from the window radiating behind him made him look like some form of angel, all Beef could do was nod in approval as he stumbled out of his bed. 

  
-  
  


The two had a slow morning filled with cereal and half hearted arguments that meant nothing when they sat down and laughed about it for ten minutes, their faces hurting from the constant smiling. But Beef wouldn’t want it any other way. 

It was now noon and they sat in Beef’s living room playing uno, the house empty and smelling of warm cinnamon and flowers from Beef’s mom’s flower arrangements lining the house. 

“Woohoo!” Etho cheered as he placed his last card down, his hands flying into the air in victory, “That makes 5 wins, Beefers.” 

“W- no way. You must’ve cheated or something! There’s no way you beat me five times in a row.” Beef’s eyes were wide in an amazed disbelief, looking over the pile of cards to inspect if the younger was indeed cheating. 

“What? I’m no cheat-tho.” He giggled to the word play with his name, getting an unamused look from the older. “Loser shuffles.” 

Beef sighed as he took up all of the cards into his hands, shifting where he sat while he realized he had the Canadian’s complete attention right now. 

“Hey Etho?” Etho hummed in acknowledgment to him, his eyes looking into Beef’s as if he was the most interesting person in the world. “I need to tell you something.”

He bit at his tongue, trying to sort the right words into his head, preparing himself to be let down and just continue being friends. As he opened his mouth, he watched those mismatched eyes flicker. 

_'What does that flicker mean? God please tell me, Etho.'_

“Etho, I think i’m in lo-”

“I’m moving back to Canada.” 

What.

Beef’s jaw dropped, his brows knitting together as he watched the younger curl in on himself after blurting his words out, wincing as he broke eye contact. “What?” 

Etho swallowed as he reached up to his necklace, holding it tightly in his hand before shakily nodding. “I’m moving back to Canada tonight.”

A million and more thoughts and questions rushed to Beef’s head but all he found himself saying is, “You’re kidding. Right?” 

He watched with sharp eyes as Etho shook his head slowly, an obvious guilt eating up his stomach the longer this went on, “Last night was our last night together. Doc’s known for months, and I told Bdubs earlier this week, but I asked them not to tell you.” 

“W- Etho, why?” 

“My dad’s gotten sick, _really_ sick, so my family's decided to move in with my relatives up in Canada.” 

“That doesn’t explain why you hid all of this from me.” Beef’s voice was loud but not angry, just firm, trying to get to the bottom of his ever growing list of questions.

“I didn’t know how you’d take it-I stopped coming to hangouts because I needed you to get used to being without me. But I missed you anyway and kept finding myself coming here at night.” He took in a shaky breath as he stood up, “I know I should’ve told you earlier. I- I’m sorry Beef.” His eyes kept flickering before he started to back up to the front door. 

“I should go- I-I’m so sorry.” He stammered before he darted for the door, Beef wasn’t even able to process all of this new information before he realized Etho had left him where he stood. 

A part of him told him to be overcome by anger about Etho keeping so much from him, another part of him told him to be stricken with surprise for not realizing what Etho was doing. But a greater part of him, possibly his entire heart, weeped for the complete feeling of _loss_. 

He had never seen Etho look so defenseless, so engulfed with guilt and sorrow. And yet he still apologized. Still apologized for something he had no control over. Apologized for trying to keep Beef _happy_. 

And regardless of all of the emotions flooding over him, Beef still identified one so loud it hurt. He was still madly in love with Etho.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooo, how's everyone feeling? *Nervous Laughter* imsosorry
> 
> I hope you guys enjoyed that chapter though, the next one might take a bit more time than usual because what I have planned may take a hot minute before I'm happy with the chapter's outcome.


	13. What Comes Next

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Check the updated tags before reading this chapter!! Thank you<3

“Matilda, dear, do you have the papers from yesterday? I seemed to have misplaced them.” Tanned fingers ran through styled brown hair as blue eyes gleamed in the metallic light of the resort’s chandelier. 

“You left them on my desk again, sir.” Matilda brushed a lock of creamy brown hair behind her ear as she laughed softly, handing the stack of papers over to the said male’s calloused hands. 

“What would I do without you?” He chuckled under his breath as he took the papers, thumbing through them with a small smile.

“Well, probably be struggling with an unorganized resort, Mr. VintageBeef.” 

Beef waved his most trusted worker off with a small flick of his hand, a rowing smirk on his playful lips as he made his way over to his office. It’s been six years since Beef’s senior year and he now ran and managed a gorgeous five star resort hotel. He was living the life he had always aimed to get-even if it did come with the occasional road block and pushy mom trying to bargain for a cheaper price. 

He had a beautiful home looking over his well established resort, an amazing team of workers, and two supportive best friends he could always turn to to lean on. The only thing he’d be missing, would be a lover. But he tried not to think about that too much. He always told himself that he needed to put the resort first, his love life second. And seeing as his resort was constantly overflowing with testificates and customers, he had a lot of work to be done to make sure it would stay that way. 

Beef breathed out a small sigh as he sunk down in his chair, scanning over his paperwork with little to no actual interest before his eyes landed on a particular sticky note he had stuck onto his desk reading out in black pen, ‘DINNER WITH BDUBS AND DOC AT 7’ Beef cursed under his breath as his eyes flickered over to his clock, 5:47. 

_‘Shit, how did I forget?’_

Beef quickly flipped through the rest of his paperwork before heading off home to get ready for dinner. He sent a quick ping to Matilda to hold down the fort while he was gone, to which she complied shortly after. 

He worked his white dress shirt off before taking a quick shower to rid himself of any sweat he had built up from running around the resort. He pulled on a black shirt and dark blue jeans, just the borderline of being too nice for a casual setting and yet too casual for a formal event. Perfect. 

He had made plans to meet up with Bdubs and Doc a full week ago, saying he needed a breath of fresh air from his resort. Sure, he loved to work and run the business, but he still had his moments of exhaustion from it all. They had agreed on meeting up at a relatively nice restaurant, a good 30 to 45 minutes away from Beef’s resort that wasn’t anything too formal. 

Beef hums as he slides into his car, turning on a random music playlist he had saved to his phone as he did so. It was a bit odd, him meeting up for dinner with Bdubs and Doc, even if they were all best friends, seeing as Doc and Bdubs had finally confessed to one another, their second year in college, and have been dating since then. He was happy for them, really, but he couldn’t help but feel like he might have been intruding on their time together whenever it was just the three of them. 

He was a good 15 minutes into the drive now, stuck in a long red light that felt like it would drag on forever, and pulled his phone up to tell Doc he might be a bit late. While flipping through his phone, he thought that he might as well check on just what playlist he had clicked on in the spur of a moment. 

He swiped to see the playlist and felt his breath stop, in large letters at the top of the phone read, ‘Sick Beat-tho’. It was Etho’s old playlist that he had made on his phone back in highschool. Beef insisted to keep it on his phone with each upgrade he got, carefully transferring the playlist for it was one of his last reminders of the male. 

Oh, Etho.

Shortly after Etho had moved away, they had tried to leave off acting like there wasn’t such a large shift between them. But Beef’s feelings kept getting in the way (despite him never actually ending up confessing), and Etho never stopped apologizing for everything, and so by the start of Beef’s first year into college, they had completely stopped talking. 

It hurt a lot for the first few months, what had once been daily texts and calls dissolved into nonexistence, the younger’s number sitting unused and unbothered in Beef’s contacts. The couch in Beef’s room remained untouched until he decided to give it away when he moved out of his parents’ house, and the box of photos was stored somewhere in the attic of his house, along with the rest of his items from highschool. The brunette had dated around in college, but no relationship lasted longer than a few months due to his heart feeling so foregin with every person he had tried with. 

He had explained everything to Bdubs and Doc, to which they agreed not to mention the youngest of their old group for the time being. What hurt Beef the worst however, was knowing that he had gotten himself roped into an unrequited love with the most perfect person he knew, and that he might never get over him. But he took his time to get back on his feet. Now he was totally over it. 

Totally...

Beef sighed as before he set his phone down, allowing the music to remain flooding his car as he began driving again, and attempted to shift his thoughts over to what he _does_ have. And tonight, he has dinner with his two best friends who stayed by his side. 

-

Beef made it to the restaurant right on the dot of 7 PM luckily, a relieved exhale leaving his body as he walked up to the table where Bdubs and Doc were seated at, a light conversation between them before Bdubs’ eyes shifted over and waved at the newly arrived brunette. 

“Sorry about that, I was in a bit of a traffic jam.” He smiled as he sat at the opposite side of the table from them.

“No worries, we barely got here without Doc losing another eye.” Bdubs joked as he offered a playful smile. 

Bdubs and Doc had grown up a lot since highschool too. Bdubs was a home designer and a bit taller, as well as a lot more built, than he had been in highschool, but still the same classic Bdubs. Doc on the other hand looked a little ways different. He worked for some kind of technical engineering company that Beef didn’t quite have enough brain cells to fully wrap his mind around but just knew it gave good pay. But his looks? The German had grown another 2 inches, making him a full 6’5. Along with that, he had gotten into a nasty accident in his final year of college which had him lose his left eye, as well as scarred up his right arm pretty badly. He almost looked like some kind of fictional mob boss if you didn’t know him. 

“As if- Bdubs was taking forever to get ready.” Doc nudged the other’s shoulder half heartedly, a toothy grin spread across his face. 

-

Their laughter came to a slow stop as Beef took in a deep breath and a sip from his drink to help cool himself off. He had really needed this. It was nice to just hang out with his best friends again without having to think about the resort for once. 

He paid little attention to a look the two exchanged among one another as he took one last bite of his dessert, finally glancing up to see a nervous look in their shared expressions. “Alright, what are you two hiding.”

“What? Nothing! How dare you accuse us.” Bdubs raised his hands up in defense before crossing them, his eyes shooting downward to avoid the blue eyes trying to pry their way into his head.

“I know those looks. I thought we promised that you two wouldn’t keep big secrets from me anymore.” Beef grumbled as he crossed his own arms, feeling like some kind of child.

Doc looked to Bdubs before sighing in his own silent internal battle, “Look, I just don’t know if you’d want to hear it.” 

“I’m all ears, Doc. I can take just about anything.” 

The look in Doc’s eyes was hesitant, almost afraid, as he parted his mouth like he was about to utter some sort of curse that would destroy the world. But regardless, he did speak, and Beef could never prepare himself for what the German was about to say. 

  
  
  


“Etho’s moving back into town.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Halfway through writing this chapter, I realized that this book might end up being the slightest bit longer than just 20 chapters, but I'm just going to update that when the time comes I guess. But anyway, I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter even though I used it most as a recap!
> 
> (Also, I do plan on writing some kind of one shot or something of Doc and Bdubs' confession in college if/when I get the time.)


	14. A Busy Beef

“Etho’s moving back into town.” 

  
The words meet his ears like a collision of cars. The impact is clear and racks through his whole body in such a painful way, Beef thinks he might be getting light headed. A thick silence falls between the three men as the couple anxiously waits for a response. 

…

  
  


“What.” Is all Beef is able to mutter as he pushes himself back from the table, a look of disbelief written all along his face as he swallows dry, his heart ringing against his ribcage violently. 

“Beef, calm down.” Bdubs spoke softly, his voice calming as he placed a hand on Beef’s forearm gently. Blue eyes gazing up to meet Bdubs’ deep chocolate brown, “Let go of the table.” 

Beef looked down to see his hands grasping the table as if his life depended on it, knuckles white and shaking. He slowly pulled his hands back and placed them in his lap and got a small reassuring nod from Bdubs. 

“When did you uh- hear about this?” Beef manages to get out as he tries to regulate his breathing. He doesn’t know if he should be happy about the news or not. 

Doc rubs at the back of his neck, rolling his shoulders into a mild guilt which rests on him like a bad knot in his muscles, “He called me the other night. Maybe two days ago, now.”

“Why’s he even moving back here?” There was a lot more hurt in his raw voice than he may have wanted there to be, but it was no secret to the other two that Etho brought a lot of emotions out of Beef. 

“He mentioned that the company he works for is sending him down here for branch scouting and some kind of mandatory vacation first. Then he’s due to move down here-for real-sometime in the three months after he’s finished with that first part.” 

“God,” Beef let out a shaky breath as he placed his hand over his eyes, a wave of stress washing over him, “Well then, when’s he supposed to be visiting, at least?” 

“Next week.”

Beef had only a week to mentally prepare himself for his childhood best friend, first love, and unintentional heartbreaker to suddenly just reappear in his life again. _Great_.

-

The world has now fallen into yet another lonely night, and Beef sat in his office going over some of the last of his paperwork before leaving to go to sleep. The dinner was nice, even if there was a bit of an awkward hole in it when Beef got all shaky at the mention of Etho. Regardless, he still had a good time and really needed to get the last of his work done. 

_Right, gotta stay productive._

But he didn’t get much done before a wave of exhaustion decided that his body required sleep much more than it did work. He sighed as he rubbed at his tired eyes, leaning back in his chair and staring up at the ceiling blankly. 

One week, and Etho’s suddenly going to be back in the same world as him, after _six_ full years. A feeling grew in his stomach that felt foreign and yet not displeasing, just bubbling insi. It gave him goosebumps but left a warmth on his skin as he ran a hand through his hair. 

_‘What am I gonna do? Well, the probability of me actually running into him is quite slim, especially if I focus most of my time on the resort. Yeah, that’s what I’ll do. I’m not an asshole for not seeing him if I’m too swamped with work!’_

Like this! Beef sweeped up a paper of a reservation made under the last name of ‘Bling’, a wealthy man who reserved one of the most expensive rooms without moving over to a suite. The reservation was listed as a room for two, so possibly a honeymoon or some kind of romantic getaway. Wouldn’t be the first couple and most definitely won’t be the last to come to his resort. 

The reservation was set for next week, _perfect_. See? He had plenty of things to focus on while Etho was here. Maybe not when he formally moves down here, but at least for now, while he was scouting or vacationing -whatever it may be- Beef could avoid him just a little while longer. 

As he allowed his eyes to fall close to relish in the brilliance of his newly set plan, a sudden memory of mysteriously flickering, mismatched eyes flashed into his head, lunging him forward with wide eyes as he had to hold himself up by grabbing onto his desk. He heaved as he drew in a heavy breath, a cold sweat starting to form on his brow, as if he had just woken up from a nightmare. His heart was beating outside of his chest now, and he couldn’t quite put his finger on the reason why. 

_Why why why_

He concluded that it must have been just overworked exhaustion trying to catch up with him, and so he left the office for the last time that night and went to try and catch some sleep. Yeah, that's what he needs.

-

A week was much too quick to pass by, and Beef was suddenly finding himself overworking himself just to keep his brain busy enough to not run back into a past he’d rather not think about right now. 

Currently, he was called upon a situation in which he was trying to diffuse an argument between an overly angered mother and one of his newer workers. The young worker's eyes were laced in a muted fear as he listened on to the woman's rambling. The said mother was going off about something that Beef honestly couldn’t care less about, but he had to manage it anyway. 

He held back an irritated sigh as he waited for the woman to finish her statement, pressing his hands together and folding them to keep himself grounded, “My dearest apologies ma’am, Karen was it?”

“Susan.”

“Of course, Susan. I’ll have your issue solved as soon as possible and deal with my worker here.” He forced a thin smile on his face as he heard the woman mutter something along the lines of ‘Good riddance” as she ushered herself and her two kids away, headed towards the beach. 

_'Thank god that was over.'_

Beef turned back to the worker who had originally requested him over, a scared look on the man’s face as he swallowed hard, “I-I’m so sorry Mr. VintageBeef!” He bowed his head as he stared anxious holes into his feet, awaiting some form of punishment to be given to him. 

“No worries, she was getting on my nerves too. How about you take an early lunch? Just cool off and stay low for awhile while she’s on the beach.” He offered a small reassuring smile as he placed his hand on the other’s shoulder, giving a small squeeze as he felt the male relax under his grip. 

“Thank you so much, sir! I promise I won’t ever disappoint you again!” And like that, he watched the young man scurry off for his early lunch, a sigh on his lips as he started on his own way, to head back to the main lobby to make sure everything over there was going smoothly. 

_‘Next order of business: check in with Matilda then make sure everything is in order in the west wing’_

But as he stepped into the sandstone lined lobby, he was quickly pulled aside by Matilda with a sharp tug of his arm, a look of mild excitement written on her face, “Sir you didn’t mention that the ‘Bling’ reservation was made by _the_ Seth Bling.” Her voice was hushed yet articulated, a sparkle in her eyes as she waited for her boss to respond.

Beef opened his mouth to talk, but Matilda could already tell just as to what was in his head by the clueless expression painted on his face asking the simple question on his tongue: 'who’s Seth Bling?'

“Seth Bling is the head of technological programming for one of the biggest companies in the world, sir. I’m sure you’ve heard of it, it’s called ‘BUD Stone’. Mr. Bling’s incredibly rich and super famous.” Beef nodded his head slowly to the new information, watching the shorter as she placed a finger on her chin as a new thought appeared in her head, “But I thought the company was stationed in Canada. So what would he be doing at our resort of all places?” 

“I mean, even billionaires could use a nice beach vacation sometrimes. Besides, I think he reserved a room for two, right? He's probably just trying to spend some time with his partner- How do you know so much about all of this kinda stuff anyway?” 

But Matilda ignored the male's question as yet another thought popped up in her head, “Then that would mean he’s in a relationship with the head of technological transportation!” Beef sighed with a small smile as he shook his head, realizing the girl was already lost in her own train of thoughts, and him questioning her would be rather useless. “What was his name again? Ethan? No, that wasn’t it. Ergo? No, not that either. Oh! It was Eth-”

  
  
  
  
  


“Beefers?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woah, another cliffhanger? ahaha, whoops...
> 
> Also, you're finally going to see why SethBling is in the story tags :))


	15. Maybe a Little Jealous

Beef whipped his head around at neck breaking speed, a pit dropping in his stomach so deep he felt he was going to puke. His eyes were set wide in a fearful disbelief, landing on a man that looked all too familiar to be a stranger, yet much too foreign to be called a good friend.

As their eyes met, Beef watched the mismatched pools of crimson and fog flicker so dark and mysteriously it lit a fire in Beef’s chest. A fire he had spent a long time trying to extinguish. 

The man on the other side of the room, just a few strides away, wore a black face mask covering his nose down to his chin and muted deep blue fabrics, but his hair was as messily fluffy and layered as ever. However, what had once been a thin, scrawny young teen, had grown into a tall, strong individual. He wasn’t quite as muscular as Beef or Doc, but still carried himself with sturdy shoulders and toned arms that probably aided him in his supposedly very wealthy job. 

His job. If he was the head of technological transportations, like Matilda had said, then that would mean he was probably here with the head of technological programming, Seth Bling. 

“Etho.” He finally breathed out, the pit in his stomach felt like it was transforming into some kind of black hole, ready to swallow Beef whole from the inside out with no mercy.

Almost suddenly, Matilda stepped closer to Beef, curiosity in her eyes as she placed her hands around Beef’s arm and instantly eased him back into a more calming reality, “You know him?” Her question was innocent and genuine, but for whatever reason, it had made the younger Canadian’s eyes flicker again. 

Beef stammered over his words, reaching for the right thing to say as he placed one of his hands over where the brunette’s fingers laced around his bicep, “Yeah um- we went to highschool together, actually.” 

Etho’s eyes shot large for a mere millisecond to Beef’s statement before reeling back in before an arm wrapped its way around his shoulder snuggly, “High School? Ah, well I guess you’ve known E for a bit longer than I have.” There stood Seth Bling, a smile on his face as he reached his unoccupied hand out to shake Beef’s own. 

Beef hesitated before accepting the gesture, something new had now joined the black hole in him and it burned brighter, louder. Whatever it was, it screamed in Beef’s ear, ‘ _ get your arm away from him, now _ ’ in such venom and spite it made Beef wince. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t introduce myself, my name’s Seth Bling. I take it you’re the famous owner of the resort, Vintage Beef?”

“Well, famous would be a stretch. I’m no head of technical programming.” He bit on his words as they left his mouth, tone laced in an unintentional challenge. “Matilda, sweetie, I have to get over to the west wing to do some check-ins. Do you mind showing our new guests, here, around?” 

“Oh- of course! Please come with me for a tour if you have all of your bags in your room already.” She smiled at the two males as they nodded and complied, Seth’s arm dropping from around Etho’s shoulder as he began following after the other. 

Beef was already halfway down the west hall when he turned around to see the three starting off towards the front. But just before exiting the lobby, Etho shifted his head over just the slightest bit, looking back into Beef’s eyes before taking his departure. 

Whatever that flicker had been from highschool, it had only gotten worse.  _ More intense _ . And it made Beef want to risk everything to know what it meant.

But Etho was obviously with someone else now. Right? Obviously happy with someone smart and rich, and most importantly: wasn’t some love sick childhood best friend. 

Besides, Beef was over Etho. 

Or at least, that’s what he tried to convince himself.

-

Everything was going along smoothly in the west wing, which was always a breath of relief into Beef’s lungs, especially right now with everything that had just happened in the lobby. Seriously, what were the odds of Etho coming to vacation at  _ his  _ resort of all places. There were plenty of places to go during the holiday around this area! And to make it all the more worse, he just  _ had  _ to come with his boyfriend.

Etho was a grown adult now. He was allowed to visit wherever he wanted, and especially date whoever he wanted. But that doesn’t mean that it still wasn’t allowed to affect Beef. 

_ ‘No. It doesn’t affect me. Because I’m not in love with Etho. I may have been back in high school. But that was forever ago! It doesn’t affect me. And I am not jealous.’ _

He thought to himself over and over again, as if the more he mumbled the words, the more truth they’d claim to his future. What a shame it did the exact opposite.

He made his way over to the spa, making his last check in for the meanwhile until he was free for a quick lunch break. Sliding open the frost glass door, he made swift work, checking in and getting a brief rundown on the happenings in said spa. 

He nodded and said his goodbyes as he walked back over to the glass door before a familiar voice came into earshot, “And this here is the spa where you can relax in our saunas, hot medicine baths, and receive cooling massages to release any sort of tension.” 

Beef held his breath, as he took a step back. They were right outside of the door and probably couldn’t quite see him, aside from a blurred silhouette, but it still rocked that same nauseous feeling through him. 

_ ‘Maybe they won’t come in and I can leave as soon as they walk away.’ _

“That just about concludes the tour though. So if you’re hungry, I can lead you back over to the dining hall where you can have some lunch.” Beef breathed out a silent praise to Matilda, he’d have to thank her later. 

“Actually, can I have a quick peak of the spa?”

Are you kidding-

Beef quickly spun around as he pulled up his clipboard, trying to look much busier than he knew he truly was. At the sound of the door opening, he faked a look of pleasant surprise, “Oh Matilda, are you finished with the tour?” He focused his eyes straight onto the girl, still trying to avoid the other two. 

“Just finished right now, actually. I was about to send them off to the dining hall.” She folded her hands in front of her as she offered a small smile. 

“So, how have you liked the resort so far?” He forced a professional smile on his face as he spared a glance at Seth who was looking around the room with a nod of his head.

“Amazing, you have an efficient team here Mr. VintageBeef, but I’d expect nothing less.” He walked up to Beef with his hands in his pockets. He was a bit taller than him but not quite the height of Doc, so Beef pulled his shoulder back just the slightest as he raised his chin. “Etho, what do you think about?” 

Etho still stood near the metal door frame, looking around the room before he pulled off the black face mask he had been wearing, “Not bad, Beefers.” He pulled together a playful grin as he looked at the said male, making Beef’s heart do a summersault. 

If Beef thought Etho looked good back when they were in highschool, he looked drop dead godly now. His pale skin was still flawlessly clear and smooth, but had now matured into a crisp jaw line and strong bone structure from what used to be slim and sharp bones peeking under glowing skin. 

Beef’s throat went dry, he opened his mouth to try to respond to the other but couldn’t seem to find his words anymore. Luckily, the ever charismatic Matilda chimed in just in time, “If you’re almost done with your rounds, I can take your clipboard back to your office while I'm over there. Just to save you the time.” 

“Thanks, that’d be great actually.” Beef handed Matilda the clipboard in his hands, feeling the slightest brush of her skin over his own as he did so, and looked up to see Etho watching his hands quietly. “You three better get going, I’d hate to cut your lunch short.” 

Etho blinked a few times before nodding and trailing after Matilda as Seth followed after, placing a hand at the small of Etho’s back just moments before the door shut, leaving Beef in the large room. Beef placed a hand on his beard, glancing down to the floor in thought.

  
  


_ ‘Okay, maybe just a little jealous’ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoops- looks like lover boy here hasn't quite moved on as much as he thought he did... 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed that chapter, it was a lot of fun to write lol,, and try not to get too mad at me ;)) I promise it'll get better for the boys... eventually <33


	16. A Talk With The Love (Doc)tor

The next two days were practically miserable for Beef. It was as if everywhere he went, the two people he’d want to see least of all seemed to follow him. Work had never been harder to focus on, and his heart had never been faced with so much simultaneous emotions all at once in such short fragments of time, it was both exhilarating and exhausting all at once. 

It was even starting to feel like it was happening on purpose. Everytime Beef managed to walk into a room, they’d be there hanging out, or if he just so happened to be glancing by a section of the resort for daily check ins, he’d see them. 

And the worst part? Etho always looked like he was having such an absolutely wonderful time. He’d laugh at whatever Seth would say, or listen to him when he talked like the world around him went silent and Seth just so happened to have the most interesting things to talk about in the history of mankind. Like Seth was the only other person to exist. Because to Etho, Seth might just actually be the only other person to exist to him. At least, that’s how it felt to Beef.

Now, of course Beef wanted Etho to have a nice time here, not only from a childhood friend perspective, but as the manager of the resort too. But a stronger part of him just simply wanted to be in Seth’s spot. To be the one making him laugh and telling him things, and be the sole attention of those gorgeous mismatched eyes. Even if he knew it was much too late for that. 

Right?

The third day rolled around quickly though, and Beef had found himself not wanting to leave his hacienda as he pulled his clothes over his shoulders. But the sun was shining bright and the sky was hued pink with not a single cloud attempting to cover it. So he pulled himself from the comfort of his home and got to work, signing off on paperwork and emails, checking in on different sections of the resort, handling some customer complaints, the usual. 

And it’s not until noon draws near does Beef realize that he’s seen no trace of Etho or Seth today. That means they’re probably doing the scouting thing that Doc had mentioned, today. Which also meant that Beef got to finally have a normal day today.  _ Thank god _ .

-

Beef hadn’t even realized his phone was ringing on the other side of his desk until he accidentally grazed it with his hand, the pulsing vibrations scaring him half to death. He must have been so concentrated on his work that he completely tuned it out of his senses. 

He picks the phone up with calloused hands and answers the call, a small hum on his lips as he hears a familiar voice coming from the other line, “Beef! Why haven’t you been answering our calls??” The German tone was firm and angered, booming through Beef’s phone and straight into his ear.

“Doc? M-my bad, I got kind of lost in what I was doing. Are you okay? You sound jumpy.” 

“Am  _ I  _ okay? I called you to ask if  _ you  _ were okay. Etho told me he’s been staying at your resort of all places last night and I wanted to make sure you were alright.” 

Oh. Beef almost completely forgot about everything with Etho right now.  _ Almost _ . 

“Um, I think I’m okay. It’s uh- it’s weird right now.” 

“Do you want to talk about it? I know i’m not as good with stuff like this as Bdubs is, but I can still listen pretty well.” The concern in the older’s voice made Beef crack a small smile to himself.

“You sure you got time for that?”

“I mean, I could use something to listen to while I work.”

Beef sighed with a small laugh, shrugging as he sat back in his chair, “Okay then, so you remember how I had that little crush on Etho that didn’t really develop until he was literally gone?”

“Well, I don't know about  _ little _ , but yeah I’m aware of it.”

“Shut up- basically, I ran into Etho at my resort the other day, and the reason why I didn’t know about him coming here was because the reservation was made under ‘Bling’.”

“As in the rich, genius Seth Bling who developed the perfect programming of BUD Stone?”

“Spot on.” He heard Doc whistle on the other line, and rolled his eyes. “And apparently this Seth Bling guy is Etho’s rich hot new perfect boyfriend. Now, bringing back what I said earlier: Turns out that little crush from highschool never actually… _left_.”

There was a short moment of silence between them, consisting of Doc taking in this new information and Beef holding his breath for what the other was going to say. 

But instead of some kind of thought out reply, the only thing that met Beef’s ears was Doc’s gruff voice uttering a small, “What do you mean by apparently?”

“What?”

He could hear the German shifting in whatever seat he was in before he started again, “I mean, have you ever seen them kiss? Or any actual confirmation that they’re actually dating?”

“W-well, no. But Seth’s always got his hands on Etho, so I just assumed-”

“But does Etho ever have his hands on Seth? I mean, I used to lean up on Etho all the time-and don’t say you never notice because I know you did- but I never liked him like that.”

The remark had Beef’s ears heating up, but he shook his head frantically as he tried to ignore the burning of his face, “But this is different-”

“Is it? Have you formally talked with Etho one on one since he left?” Doc’s voice was so dry, yet sure of himself, Beef was starting to lose his baring over where this conversation was going. But wherever Doc was planning to lead it, it was somehow going to work in Doc’s favor. That’s just how he was.

“No. No, not really, actually.”

“Then how can you be for sure that he’s in a relationship with Seth?” 

“It’s context clues Doc, I’m sure of it. He’s probably out on some kind of date with him right now.” 

There was another short pause before Doc chuckled to himself, barely audible through the phone and yet loud enough to quirk an eyebrow from Beef's end. Before he could actually question the older however, Doc spoke again.

“Ah, I hear the jealousy in your voice, now. Sorry, it was being muffled by you being a little bitch.”

“What? I am not!”

“Then talk to him. Even if you two had a fall out, there’s obviously at least some kind of unresolved sexual tension still there. Get that sorted and maybe then you can finally get some actual answers. You do yourself no good by living in assumptions.”

Beef huffed out a breath, hunching forward in his chair, “And if i’m right? Then what? I just live the rest of my life hanging onto some one sided love? That’s depressing.”

“But you’d get closure. I’m no cupid, hell I’ve only ever liked a single person in my entire life Beef, but I can feel there’s something about you two. I’m saying this as your best friend who cares about you two.”

“Okay-okay I’ll think about it.” 

“Good. I’ll leave you to it then, Beef. I have to go, bye.”

“Later, Doc.”

Beef sat there in the silence of his office, hand still wrapped around his phone as he hung his head down low between his arms and sighed long and heavy. He felt exhausted just thinking about having to talk to Etho. Not because he didn’t want to, _of course he wanted to talk to him_ , but because he was deathly afraid of the outcome.

The last time they had talked, it was like there was a barrier between them, that comfort of late nights and gentle knee bumps had dissolved along with his own confidence in the other man. To be honest, he wanted to talk to Etho  _ so  _ bad-he wanted to talk to him more than anything! But the biting fear of him not knowing what he’d even say ate him up from the inside. Besides, nothing could ever bring them back to where they used to be. Not anymore. 

_ 'Maybe later. Just let me pretend that everything is normal for today.' _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love writing Doc's character so much, I really need to do it more often lol
> 
> Anyway, next chapter will be a bit of a roller coaster of emotions so get those tissues ready and try no to hate me too much <3


	17. You Said You'd Always Remember Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Get your tissues ready <33

It’s been two days since Beef’s talk with Doc and he was trying a lot harder than he would like to to admit that he was trying to avoid the other. He knows he should probably take Doc’s advice and talk everything through with him, but he  _ really  _ didn’t want to. No amount of preparation could ever ready Beef’s heart or mind for whatever that conversation would have in store for him. 

But the memories of flickering eyes and small giggles made him itch for some kind of rekindling. Some kind of ignition to an empty fire pit of what used to be a beautiful brilliant flame. And he suddenly would get a wave of confidence to approach the younger and sit him down and talk to him about everything that had been bubbling in his brain for the last few years.

And yet just as quickly as that surge of confidence had come, it had dissipated into the void of lost thoughts.

Like now for example, Beef had briefly passed Etho in the main lobby while changing out the little pamphlets for the excursions and weekly events, a part of him screamed at himself to quickly scurry away while he still had the chance to, but that damned confidence ran over his body with a fire and pulled him closer to the younger unwillingly. 

“Etho, uh-” The moment the said male whipped his head around and gave a silent smile to the older, he suddenly felt all traces of that confidence to be gone yet again. 

_ ‘Thanks for nothing.’ _

Words became foreign as he pulled back into himself, before taking in a shaky breath and reaching out a pamphlet he was holding in his hand to the other, “We’re having musicians perform at the beach tomorrow night starting 8 o’clock. I’m sure you and Seth would enjoy it.” He cringed at the robotic sound of his voice, quickly drawing back as he gave a sheepish smile. 

Etho took the pamphlet with a slight hesitance, “Oh um, thanks Beefers. But I was actually hoping I could talk to you.” There was a light sparkle in his eyes that made Beef’s heart churn in a way he’d never be able to describe. 

_ ‘This is my chance’ _

But as he opened his mouth, flashes of Etho with Seth bombarded his brain, causing him to spit out words he didn’t even know he was processing, “Sorry, can we postpone? I have some things to do.” 

_ ‘What. That’s not what I meant to say.’ _

Etho’s eyes flickered before shooting downwards to glance at the tiled floors, “Oh. Sorry for bothering you then. Can you come talk to me afterwards then? I promise it won’t take too long.” 

Beef wrapped his free hand around the back of his neck, rubbing at it slowly before his mouth got a mind of its own, “Y’know if it doesn’t take too much time then maybe it’s not important. Maybe there’s nothing to talk about in the first place, eh?” His voice still sounded so empty, because he _didn’t_ _mean_ any of those words.

_ Why am I saying this?? This isn’t how I feel! What is wrong with my stupid mouth? _

“Not important?... Beef-” There was a hurt in Etho’s voice that Beef would much rather never have to think about, because of how utterly painful it felt hitting his ears. He never wanted to make Etho feel like that. Ever. 

“I should get going.” He interjected, trying to leave the situation before he blurted anything else that he knew he didn’t mean. Before he heard anymore of that raw emotion in Etho’s words. 

Beef was quick to turn on his heel, darting for a door that he knew led to a hallway that almost never had people going through. Just someplace he could reassort his brain and figure out just as to what his mouth was doing. He heard a small, ‘wait’ behind him as he tried to block out any and all noise, diving into his own head to try and get a grasp onto something. 

What he wasn’t expecting was for Etho to follow him into the hallway, his eyes setting wide in a muted disbelief as the door shut behind them, leaving the two of them alone for the first time in what felt like forever.

“Beefers, this isn’t like you. Are you okay?” 

“Why do people keep saying that? I’m fine! Perfectly fine! Or at least I was before  _ you  _ showed up again.” He was quick to slap his hands over his mouth, taking a step back from the other in his own shock.

Etho visibly curled in on himself, slouching over just a bit, pulling his hands close to his chest as he stared holes into Beef’s blue eyes, the flicker was now gone and that dark hue that used to appear for mere milliseconds was written deep all over his eyes. “I just-I want to talk to you.” 

“Look, I’m really busy right now.” He lied straight through his teeth as he turned back around starting his way down the hall. 

There was a beat of silent before Etho took in a sharp breath, “You said you’d always remember me and yet you’re standing here treating me like I'm some stranger. And now you’re just going to get up and walk away as if everything is fine?” Etho’s words broke Beef’s heart, he sounded weak and defenseless, scared and raw and lonely. _And Beef was the cause of it._

But instead of sympathizing with the other, like Beef’s heart had cried out, he shifted himself over to look at Etho with a look of anger his brain produced without an ounce of his own right of decision. 

“Getting up and walking away, huh? Weird, because last I remember  _ you  _ were the one who left  _ me _ .” He didn’t know what he was saying. Maybe it was the built up anger he had gotten during the years and been hiding under his undying love, or even the emotions he had forced dormant when Etho had first left. But whatever it was, he spat it out with such unfiltered venom, the younger physically flinched. 

“ _You_ left and didn’t bother ever trying to fix anything with me for _ six years _ , Etho. Now you show up here with some handsome, rich, genius by your side and think we can just talk and hang out like when we were kids? _ Of course _ I still remember you, Etho. I remember everything about you! You showing up late at my house and sleeping on my couch, or you beating me at basketball everyday in Doc’s driveway. In fact, all I’ve been trying to do since the moment you left was to forget about you!  _ But I can’t _ . And I  _ hate  _ it.”

He finally opened his eyes, not even realizing he had closed them when he was venting out to the other. But the image he saw made his whole body ache, Etho stood there, his hand clasped around something near his neck as his shoulders shook in a muted tremor. And his face? His mouth stayed a thin closed line, his cheeks flushed and eyes wide and wet with unshed tears as they stared into the floor to distract himself from letting the tears loose. 

The younger nodded slowly as he swallowed hard and inhaled a breath that was much to heavy to actually aid him in his compression of emotions, “I see. Well, I’m sorry I keep assuming I know you when I clearly don’t.” Beef watched the other exit the hallway, his mouth screwed shut as he heaved in his own staggered breath.

_ ‘What the hell did I just do? ‘ _

  
  


He doesn’t quite know how he got there, but next thing he knew, he was leaning against the door frame to his bedroom, staring at his feet and clenching his knuckles so hard they turned white and ached. He flopped on his bed and stared up at his ceiling, trying to remember just as to what he had said earlier, seeing as it was all blurry in his own perspective. He was so blinded by an anger he didn't even know existed that he ended up hurting the one person he loved more than anything. In al of his life, he'd never seen Etho look so broken, so small and hurt and on the verge of tears. He didn't know what to do.

But he knew one thing for sure. He needed to apologize to Etho. 

Etho didn’t deserve to be yelled at. Yeah, it did hurt when he left and it still hurts even now that he’s finally trying to rekindle their relationship. But at least he’s  _ trying _ . When all Beef was doing was wallowing in his own assumptions and unpromised future. 

He raised a hand over his head, covering his eyes, and gave a deep sigh, ‘ _ I’ll apologize to him tomorrow. For now he should be allowed to get away from whatever kind of mess I am right now.’ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaaaand I hope you enjoyed that :)) And if you didn't- well that's perfectly understandable but still. It didn't help that I was listening to sad love songs while writing this, so you can blame that. (Speaking of which, I'd recommend 'Reason to Hate You' by Rhys Lewis because it oddly fits well with Beef's situation.)
> 
> Also, book's almost over! AAHHH, I have another story planned but I'm not sure if I'm going to make it an actual book on here because of some OOC 'mature-ish' themes the story will have, but we'll see eventually :))


	18. Formal Apology

The morning had never felt so bittersweet as peeking rays of sun danced across tanned skin. A part of Beef was itching to do something so that he could lose some of the nerves -from going over what he wants to say to Etho today- all night, but another part of him just wants to stay inside all day and hide in the shame of his own mistakes. However, when push comes to shove, he still had work to do around the resort. 

He pulled himself out of bed and shivered in the morning air that felt so foreign to him. He wrapped tanned arms around himself as he huffed out a strangled breath. His movements were drawn out and lethargic. His feet and shoulders had never felt heavier as he got ready for the day, his shirts feeling too uncomfortable around his tight chest and feet dragging as he maneuvered his way around his hacienda. He took extra time looking into his bathroom mirror today, calloused fingers tracing the light bags underneath his eyes. He swallowed hard as he worked to pull himself together, if not mentally, he could at least make himself  _ look  _ like he was fine. 

_ Fake it til you make it, right? _

-

Beef had just finished his morning rounds the following day when he ran into Seth in the main lobby. He was hoping that Etho was somewhere near, but when he saw no traces of the other Canadian, he had to ask the other.

Despite how heavily he dreaded it.

He painted a smile on his face as he approached the other, “G’morning Seth. Is Etho not with you today?” Beef held a hopeful glint in his eyes and a silent prayer under his breath that Etho hadn’t told Seth about how much of an ass Beef was to him yesterday.

Lucky for Beef, the look on Seth’s face gave enough explanation for his prayer, “No, he should still be in the room right now, said he wasn’t really feeling too good this morning. Can you make sure he’s okay? He came back into the room quieter than usual last night. He didn’t wanna talk about it, so I’m not really sure what happened.”

Beef took in a sharp breath as he nodded his head, his stomach filling with a thick guilt, “Yeah, I’ll go talk to him. No worries.” 

_ ‘As if it wasn’t my fault he’s in that state in the first place.’ _

He said a quick goodbye to Seth as he made his way up to the room that Seth had reminded him they were staying in. His heart thumped out of his chest as he made his way over to the elevators, pushing the button to work the mechanics, while his foot tapped at increasing speeds. 

When he finally made it outside of the room he paused,  _ ‘Maybe I should’ve thought this over a bit more’ _ He cursed under his breath before he finally knocked on the sturdy door. 

_ Too late. No going back now _ .

“Etho?” He was met with only silence, but a faint yet familiar scent hit Beef’s nose and he smiled meekly to himself as he tried again, “Etho, I know you’re in there... I smell Mozzarella sticks.” He continued to stand there in front of the door, his head tilted downward to stare at where the floor disappeared into the room before hearing the muffled sound of movements. Fabrics and items shifting about before the relieving sound of footsteps entered the fray.

The sound got closer until Beef knew that Etho was standing right in front of the door on his own respective side. Right in front of him if not for the physical barrier that separated them. He imagined the male standing before him, imagined the lovely pale skin and messy white hair and those mismatched eyes. He took in a staggered breath before forcing the next three words out of his mouth, “Etho, I’m sorry.” 

…

With no response from the younger, Beef felt the guilt inside of him bubbling into his throat. But he swallowed it down and clasped his hands together to try and keep the tremors that shook through his hands to calm down. 

“I realized you were the only one apologizing, and you shouldn’t have been. I should’ve apologized for not being there for you in highschool when you were falling apart. You probably don’t want to see me right now. I know I wouldn’t.” He chuckled humorlessly before he took in a sharp, shaky breath and wiped his face, when had he started crying? 

“But I just-I just had to come and apologize. Because -fuckin’ hell- I said some really shitty things to you yesterday. You’re allowed to do whatever you want, go wherever you want,  _ love _ whoever you want. I had no right to get mad at you. I just-  _ I missed you so much _ . And when you left, I guess I took it personally, but bottled it up inside. I know that that doesn't excuse me- I could never find my words around you.”

He was now starting to sob, wiping at his eyes frantically before any tears were actually able to stream down his reddened cheeks. The sound of a door opening had his head glancing upwards, his breath stuttering as the younger hid behind it before opening it just a bit wider, exposing himself. 

He wore a black tank top and sweatpants, his hair a bedhead of messy white layers and his eyes were puffy like he’d been crying. - _ God, did Beef really stoop so low that he made Etho cry? _ \- But his heterochromatic eyes flickered with that same dark hue that Beef’s been thinking about for years-on-years and a necklace that looked all too familiar hung from his neck as he wrapped his arms around Beef gently, as if he would break the brunette if he held on too tightly. But Beef wanted nothing more than to be held tightly by the younger, silently promising that he’d never leave him again. 

Beef stood there in the younger’s warm embrace until he finally got his breathing back to normal, nodding as Etho mumbles a small, “Let’s sit down and talk inside, yeah?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit of a shorter chapter since next chapter the boys will have a long overdue talk,, so be ready for that
> 
> I also just wanted to say thank you guys sm for the support on this story, I've had so much fun writing it and reading your comments. This was my first work on ao3 and the fandom, and it's been so much fun :)) Thank you


	19. Closure

The silence that fell over the two as Etho let Beef into the room weighed heavy over Beef’s shoulders. The conversation to come was years in the making. And Beef just hoped he could control his tongue and keep in his tears this time. 

The two sat down at a small coffee table in the room, an awkward silence surrounding them before Beef opened his mouth, “So um- how’s your dad?” He bounced his knee where he sat, staring at his feet to try and ease the awkward tension that filled the air.

Etho hummed as he shifted where he sat, “He’s good. Both of my parents are healthy, I pay for all of their expenses now.” His words were carefully picked, hesitant as if walking on thin ice yet warm like the Sun after a bad storm.

Beef bit on his lip before finally glancing up, his eyes scanning over the other who sat patiently beside him, “You kept the necklace I got you.” He blinked a few times, checking his eyes to make sure they were working correctly, especially after crying for the first time in a while. 

Etho looked down to his hands thoughtfully before wrapping them around his necklace, fiddling with the diamond dressed bar and smiled softly, “I wear it everyday. It was my request, after all.”

Beef nodded to himself before sighing out a pitiful excuse for a laugh, dry and humorless, “Y’know, I honestly never thought you’d pop up into my life again.”

“To be honest, I planned on that. But then my company decided they wanted to branch out down here and asked Seth and I to go.” Right.  _ Seth _ . Almost forgot about him. 

“Etho, I have a confession to make. And I know it doesn’t matter anymore, but I just have to get this off my chest. While I still can.” He spoke quickly, eliminating any points for Etho to interrupt him. 

Etho nodded, small and barely recognisable if Beef hadn’t been staring at him like he was the only thing left in the world. But he was. “I was madly in love with you during senior year. In fact, I was still madly in love with you all throughout college. And- and maybe I still am…”

He winced as his voice died out into a moment of silence before he suddenly felt soft lips on his. So smooth and plush, heavenly and millions of times better than he could ever even hope to imagine. He felt the world fall away and pushed himself just the slightest bit closer to Etho, placing his hands on the pale skin of Etho’s sharp jaw. His slightly chapped lips kissed the younger slowly, lovingly yet still desperate for more, to never let go.

After what felt like forever and yet no time at all they pulled away from each other, chests heaving and faces flushed deep shades of red and pink. And the look in Etho’s eyes. His heterochromatic eyes were so dark and desperate, the meaning behind the ‘flicker’ finally clicking in Beef’s head.  _ Longinging _ . Longing to be kissed and held and loved on with every fiber of Beef’s being. Complete and undivided desire. 

But even to how sweet of a song that had sounded to Beef, he reeled himself back, standing from the couch in a swift jolt and shuffling backwards just the slightest bit. “Wait a minute.” There was a look of confusion and fear written all over Etho’s face as he spoke. “I-I’m not some homewrecker. I don’t wanna ruin anything that you and Seth have-”

“What? Me and Seth??” A different kind of confusion flashed on Etho’s face as he looked up to Beef.

“Yes, you and Seth! You two are together… Aren’t you?” 

“No…? Beef, Seth is straight. He has a fiance back in Canada.” 

“Then- why is he so touchy with you?” 

“Beef, he actually rarely ever touches me. And whenever he does, it doesn't mean anything aside from platonic.” Well now he felt like an overdramatic, jealous, idiot. “And anyway, I should be the one freaking out, aren’t you with that sweet brunette girl?”

“Matilda? She’s one of my workers, she’s like a little sister to me at most.” 

“Oh.” Now both of their faces were shot red with a new blush of embarrassment. Silence falling over them as they tried to control the blush rushing to their faces, causing the warm colors to spread in the first place. 

“So, all of college, eh?” Etho mumbled into the hand he was using to try and shield his blush, as Beef sat back down on the couch beside him.

Beef tilted his head so that he was faced away from the other as he tried sorting out his mind. The familiar touch of their knees bumping against each other helped soothe the burning blush over his face, “Yeah, pretty much.” 

Etho hummed as he leaned over and slowly rested his head on Beef’s shoulder, earning a small almost unnoticeable flinch from the brunette. “I think I realized I was in love with you in Freshman year.” 

“W-What?” Beef turned his head to see Etho staring forward emptily, eyes lost in his own thoughts. “Why didn’t you ever say anything?” 

“You started dating other people. And I didn’t want to intrude on anything. Then by the time you seemed to finally get feelings for me back, I had gotten news that I’d be moving back.” His thoughtful eyes clouded deep with guilt and past regrets as he spoke. “I sound like a broken record, but I really am sorry for never telling you in advance about me moving back. You had every right to yell at me yesterday.” 

Beef’s eyes widened as he watched the younger shift where he sat almost uncomfortably before pressing his leg against Beef’s own, his hands occupying themselves with his necklace. “What? Did you not hear me outside of your door earlier? I shouldn’t have yelled at you, acting like you abandoned me when you were clearly going through things! I’ve never had to worry about my parents’ health, never had to worry about leaving my best friends behind, none of that.”

_ “But you never got closure _ . I never actually told you why I refused to tell you in advance. I never told you the real reason why I would show up at your house or steal your clothes, and you never pried on it so I just went with it.” 

…

“So why is it,” Beef hesitantly rested his own head over Etho’s, leaning into the touch of the other as he slowly laced his fingers with the other’s free hand, his heart in his throat and drumming so loud in his chest Etho could probably hear it. “Why’d you never tell me you were leaving?” 

Etho sighed quietly, rubbing small circles into Beef’s hand, “It didn’t seem like you knew about your feelings for me yet, so I thought I could try to get away for as long as possible as  _ just a best friend _ so that you wouldn’t get heartbroken. If I had told you, I thought you’d treat me differently. Maybe even realize your feelings quicker and eventually lose me the moment you’d gotten me. I guess my grand plan backfired though.” He breathed out a humorless laugh. 

“And is that why you came back? Doc told me you’re supposed to be moving back here permanently. Surely you didn’t just come back just to apologize again.”

“I sort of did. I felt there was something unfinished here. It wasn’t until I got here did I realize that what it was, was us.” Beef’s brows were knit together in an unspoken question, he gave a quick small squeeze to Etho’s hand in reassurance. 

“Y’know, you deserve more credit than you give yourself. You carried a heavy burden for months -years technically- and yet still think you need to apologize. How about this, no more apologizing for things that happened in the past?”

Etho hesitated and took in a deep breath, slowly raising his head from its spot on Beef’s shoulder so that he could make eye contact with the older. “That doesn’t sound too bad. Just, don’t forget.” His mismatched eyes flickered as he offered a small trying smile. 

Beef pressed his forehead against the other’s, Etho’s unruly white hair tickling his skin as he smiled like an idiot, “I’ll try to remember.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter collectively stressed me out to another universe and yet was so therapeutic to write??? I have a hard time writing long pieces of dialogue so this was definitely a challenge but 100% worth it,, hope you guys enjoyed <33


	20. A Happy Ending

They wasted no time on making it official, having waited what could very possibly be forever just to hold each other in one another’s arms. It was slow and foreign at first, still trying to learn about one another’s love languages and preferences, their newly developed habits and remembering old ones. But they wouldn’t want it any other way.

It was now early November and they’d been together for a few months now. Seeing as it was getting colder, the resort wasn’t nearly as busy as it had been when they first reunited. But Beef didn’t mind. Because it allowed him to have mornings like these.

Tanned arms wrapped loosely around the lower back of his lover, chin pressed against the unruly messy white hair as their feet tangled underneath the covers of their shared bed. It was nearing 7 am and Beef had been up for at least ten minutes, but chose to lie there with the comfort of the other, basking in the loving warmth and feeling of the younger in his embrace. 

One of the first things Beef learned about Etho, when the younger had moved in with him, was that the younger’s sleeping schedule had somehow gotten worse since high school. Now, Beef will admit that he doesn’t exactly have the best of sleeping schedules, but he most definitely got at least 6 hours of sleep most nights. Etho on the other hand would sometimes only get 6 hours of sleep a  _ week _ . And no amount of nagging from Beef seemed to be able to change that.

So Beef lied there quietly, running his fingers through the other’s hair as Etho clung to his sleeping shirt, burying his face deeper into Beef’s chest. Beef felt his heart in his throat, still feeling tongue tied when Etho would make even the smallest of gestures towards him. 

A sudden, quiet, groan broke his thought process though, and pulled him back to reality as he spared a small glance down at his lover.  _ ‘Lover’ _ , he was still getting used to the word. Etho started to stir awake, rubbing at one of his eyes before looking up to make eye contact with Beef. 

Lovely heterochromatic eyes flickered and Beef wasted no time pulling him into a quick kiss on his nose, “Morning sleepy head. What are you doin’ up?” 

Etho yawned as he chased Beef’s lips for a proper kiss, finally pecking their lips together, “I needa get some work done.” He groaned before starting to get up but was brought back down to the bed with a small tug by Beef’s grip around his waist. 

“No you don’t- you were up all night last night working.” The older pulled him into his chest, tightening his grip around the other’s waist to hold him there. 

Etho let out a small whine as he squirmed in the grip of his boyfriend’s arms, “Beefers, let me go.”

“What, you don’t want to be with me right now?” Beef faked a pout as he smiled down to the other, watching him groan before pulling together his own mischievous smirk.

“Exactly.” Etho took the small point of opening to slip out of Beef’s grip and straddle the older’s waist, his smirk unwavering. A quick blush grew over Beef’s face as he watched the way the morning sunlight peeked from behind their window curtains and drizzled into the room, outlining Etho’s figure. He looked simultaniously heavenly and like a mischevious little demon all at the same time, and it did something to Beef's chest that was packed with too much energy for this early in the morning.

The younger threw his leg over Beef, sliding off of him and climbed out of bed, a bounce in his step as he started off towards the bathroom, leaving Beef in his lovesick haze. Beef sighed in defeat, knowing just how stubborn Etho could be and sprawled himself out on the large bed, arms spread wide as he heard the shower starting.

It was still odd to think that the man he had been pining for for years was finally with him. Still odd to think that he could wake up with the younger beside him. Still odd to think that he got his happily ever after. Still odd to think that all he needed to do was have an actual conversation with Etho in order to get everything sorted. 

He rose with a small groan, stretching his arms up and over his head, feeling a distinct pop in his back before sighing and finally climbing out of bed. He could hear the shower stopping, and smiled to himself knowing that Etho’s weird shower habits were as constant as always. 

He started to get dressed, changing out his pants before pulling off his shirt and rummaging around to look for the one he told himself he was going to wear today. From the other side of the room the sound of the door opening just to quickly shut back closed rang through the room, Beef glancing over to the said door with a cocked brow.

“Knock Knock. Are you decent?” Etho’s voice chimed from the other side of the door, making Beef rumble out a small laugh.

“E, you’ve seen me shirtless before.” 

The door opened slowly, exposing Etho with a crooked grin on his pale face, “Just being polite.” He stepped into the shared room and walked up to Beef to plant a small kiss on his cheek. 

“Alright Mr. Polite, have you seen my white polo? I can’t find it.” Etho hummed as he walked over to his own set of drawers, pulling out the said shirt and handing it to the other. “Huh, when did that get there?” Turns out Etho’s old habit of stealing Beef’s clothes never left either.

“I dunno. Maybe you should stop mixing our laundry.” Etho shrugged innocently, despite the mischief lacing his tone as he stuck his tongue out playfully. 

The two moved around the room as they finished up their morning routines, smiles on their lips and half hearted banter on their tongues as they stole quick kisses and lingering glances. It wasn’t until they were both completely ready for the day did they finally reel back. They stood by the door of the hacienda, saying their goodbyes for the day. 

“I’ll be back at 6 because we have dinner with Doc and Bdubs tonight, okay? You better remember.” Etho smiled before he kissed at the bearded Canadian then pulled his black face mask over his nose. 

“Alright alright, I’ll remember.” Beef waved him off in mock irritation despite the smile on his face that was all too smitten to be anything but undeniable love. Blue eyes watched his lover head out and sighed something small as he left the house to start on his check ins around the resort. 

_ Yeah. Beef loved moments like these. _

_ Fin. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That marks the end of this story! YAY (but also nooo because I've enjoyed writting this so much) 
> 
> Incase you didn't know I also started a series called 'When You're Famous' that will include scrapped scenes/chapters, retells from different perspectives, and add-ons that correlate into this same universe! So if you're interested in some of that stuff go check it out :))
> 
> Lastly, thank you to everyone for all of the sweet comments, kudos and overall support on this story <3 this was my first work on ao3 and contribution to Hermitcraft,, and I know for a fact I want to write more for this fandom. 
> 
> Thank you <33


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